Unanswered [8] | Urgent [0]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width   Posts: 6


( IELTS essay) television has a great impact on our lives..?



joythblessy 86 / 267  
Jan 18, 2013   #1
Television has the biggest impact on our life because it is the most popular way of getting information. Do you agree or disagree?

Television is one of the miracles of science. If has a great impact on all walks of life, as it is an easy tool of information. I agree that, television bring insurmountable changes in the day-to-day lives of people.

To begin with, as television is an audio visual media it has a great impact on it's viewers. Latest information relating the fields of education and entertainment are available through television. Students can broaden their knowledge by watching documentaries and news updates. Channels like animal geographic and B.B.C are excellent tools to learn more and their academic performance will improve. Besides, the advertisements in television provide the details and the entry of a new product, which enables people to make a better choice and selection of price and quality. This eventually, gives them financial benefit and satisfaction.

Apparently, since 'seeing is believing', it is an effective way to educate people about teaching desirable behaviors like following rules, abolishing a bad habit such as smoking and so forth. Through breaking news, news around the globe is easily accessible to members of the society. It enlighten them about the latest developments in every field. For instance, the news about economic crisis makes people to be more vigilant in share market and move on to more secure investments. Moreover, the talk shows and live discussions broaden the horizons of their knowledge and remove their doubts related to that subject. To illustrate, the discussion with a doctor about AIDS, provides mode of transmission, sign and symptoms in detail and they are able to removing their doubts and protect themselves. Political leaders can publish their policies and public can discuss and think about the pros and cons of these policies. These are capable of molding public opinions and desirable changes. Therefore, television can make differences in people' lives.

On the other hand, not all impacts are positive. The fast way of getting information and entertainment make people lazy and trim down outdoor games. It invites drastic physical and psychological problems like obesity, isolation and so on. Craze for more things, distraction in studies spoil the lives of people.

To conclude, television is a powerful medium of imparting information. It is able to create drastic changes in our lives and our decisions. Therefore, I believe that the information from these 'idiot boxes' has a great impact on the society.

mcuong01 12 / 24  
Jan 18, 2013   #2
392 words. Too long. You surely have enough time to do that in a real exam.
dumi 1 / 6809  
Jan 19, 2013   #3
. If has a great impact on all walks of life

... generally "all walks of life" means about different careers... So I don't know it is the most appropriate usage for this idea

It has a great impact on people of all walks of life.
To begin with, as television is an audio visual media itwhich has a great impact on it's viewers. -------------- good :)
Latest information relating to the fields of education and entertainment are available through television.

Channels like animal geographic and B.B.C are excellent tools to learn more and their academic performance will improve.

I think you are referring to "National Geography" and "Animal Planet"

Besides, the advertisements in television provide us with knowledge about the details and the entry of a new products , which enables people to make a better choice and selection of price and quality.

.... pay attention to the fixes I made. :)
devabe2005 46 / 96  
Jan 19, 2013   #4
require more vocabulary.
Pahan 1 / 1826  
Jan 19, 2013   #5
Television is one of the miracles of science.

Nice beginning.

To begin with, as television is an audio visual media it has a great impact on it's viewers.

To begin with, as television is an audio visual media it that has a great impact on it's viewers.

You talk too much on the positives of television. You have only written a couple of lines regarding the negative side of TV. Better balance it out.
OP joythblessy 86 / 267  
Jan 19, 2013   #6
Hai ....
Dumi, Pahan, Dev and Cuong...

Hai dumi...
Thanks for your correction..

Hai Pahan..
Thanks for the sugessions..

Hai Dev..
That is my main problem, i will try...).

Hai Cuong..
Thanks for your concern..
I am strictly following the time limit, and it is 35mints...).
With constant practice you too can achieve it...try...):

Thanks for all
Tessy


Home / Writing Feedback / ( IELTS essay) television has a great impact on our lives..?
Do You Need
Academic Writing
or Editing Help?
Need professional help with your assignments? Fill out one of these forms:

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Best Essay Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳