Unanswered [13] | Urgent [0]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width Posts: 3


DO YOU THINK THE ADVANTAGES OF CHARGING PEOPLE FOR ADMISSION TO MUSEUMS OUTWEIGH THE DISADVANTAGES?


Karry Wang 1 / 1  
Jul 6, 2019   #1

Museum charge for admission fee, while others are free



MANY MUSEUMS CHARGE FOR ADMISSION WHILE OTHERS ARE FREE. DO YOU THINK THE ADVANTAGES OF CHARGING PEOPLE FOR ADMISSION TO MUSEUMS OUTWEIGH THE DISADVANTAGES?
Some people think that museums should be had an entrance fee, while some do not. Although this may cause some potential drawbacks, I believe that the benefits are more remarkable.

A major disadvantages of admission fee is the possibility of reducing the number of visitors. Museums house exhibitions and artefacts are completely a great educational and historical value. If the purpose of museum is imparting natural cultural to visitors and publics, admission should be free for them. Students and children, for instance, who are learning about the world may not be able to visit since their finance could not cover the cost. If they had charged an entrance fee many people might be turned to other activities.

However, I believed that an entrance fee might have a negative effect on the admission figures, but an income is favourable to museum in term of operations. Museums features educational exhibitions at time, and this could not be done without money expended on hiring professional and buying equipment to serving visitors. In additions, a charge for entry might actually make people value a museum more, whereas free entrance seems to degrade the worth of the museum. To take History museum in HCM as example, it has monthly exhibitions on different issues and professional are employed to take visitors on a guided a round museums.

In conclusions, despite some negative aspects, it seems to me that the benefits of an entrance fee for the operation and development of museums.
Maria - / 1,098 389  
Jul 6, 2019   #2
@Karry Wang
Hi there.

Welcome to the forum. I'll provide you with feedback on your writing.

The first sentence right off the bat needs revision because it's ungrammatical. Focus on fixing these small slip-ups that can drastically affect the structure of your writing. Focus on the composition and how you move between the flow of your words.

While you cited one example, trying to incorporate more concrete and real life information to back up your statements would definitely help you in the long run. Focus on enhancing the depth of writing through having a more concrete approach to writing.

Best of luck as always.
OP Karry Wang 1 / 1  
Jul 7, 2019   #3
@Maria
You mean my example in paragraph 1, I see and I will repair in next time. Thanks you for your feedback! That really help me a lot. By the way, can you give me a template for my fisrt sentence?


Home / Writing Feedback / DO YOU THINK THE ADVANTAGES OF CHARGING PEOPLE FOR ADMISSION TO MUSEUMS OUTWEIGH THE DISADVANTAGES?
Writing
Editing Help?
Fill in one of the forms below to get professional help with your assignments:

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Best Essay Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳