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Ielts task 2: Do you think the development of technology is positive or negative and why?


hoangtran 2 / 4  
Jun 8, 2022   #1
Around the world, many adults are working from home, and more children are beginning to study from home because technology has become cheaper and more accessible.

Do you think this is a positive or negative development?


Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
You should spend about 40 minutes on this task.


The development of technology has allowed many adults and youngsters to work and study from home. Although I believe that technology has excessive beneficial impacts on people's lifestyles, I also think that the improvement of technology can be negative in some ways.

On the one hand, recently due to the outbreak of the Covid-19 pandemic, smart devices such as computers and mobile phones have become an essential element in people's lives as they allowed people to keep in touch with others and work from home. Moreover, because technology is cheaper nowadays, children in rural areas can easily get access to the Internet which positively contributed to their learning. For instance, instead of being restricted by geographical boundaries, digital classes enable students to make effective use of traveling time. With this significant amount of preparation time, these juniors will have more spare time for hobbies and outdoor activities.

On the other hand, using smart devices without limitations can cause health problems. In fact, if children concentrate on playing computer games, their eyes will be affected by the screen lights from technologies. Furthermore, they can easily get addicted to computer games. In accordance with a survey made by my classmates, more than 70% of high school students have to wear glasses from a young age because of having bad eyesight.

In conclusion, even though I agree that technology has beneficial effects that can help adults and children tackle many issues, spending excessive time using technology can create a detrimental lifestyle that will damage people's health. That is why people need to limit their time spent on the usage of technology to avoid having health issues.

(273w)
Holt  Educational Consultant - / 14,767 4773  
Jun 8, 2022   #2
The essay meets the word count requirements but not the opinion criteria. The lack of a clear opinion is evidenced by the agreement of the willr in a partial manner with both provided ideas. Such a discussion format is allowed only in an extent comparative essay which is not the format required by this discussion. The writer has accidentally produced 2 problems at this point:

1. A lack of single opinion focus.
2. Incorrect task format.

These mistakes dangerously lower the preliminary score as only partial scores will be awarded in other sections due to the discussion format error. It may cause an overall failing score. The writer must become familiar with more Task 2 discussion types and how to properly approach them to avoid the same mistake in the future.
Chloeduong 1 / 2  
Jun 9, 2022   #3
"recently due to the outbreak of the Covid-19 pandemic" this sentence sounds weird, but you can change it into "due to the outbreak of the Covid-19 pandemic"

Try to cut down "because", in a good essay, we should not avoid the word repetition error.


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