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My Thrilling Birth Day Surprise in Royal Boutique - simple narrative essay


Komank Sukarma 4 / 12  
Mar 13, 2015   #1
My Thrilling Birth Day Surprise

My unforgettable experience happened in my birth day surprise several months ago in Royal Boutique. It all came on December 20th, 2014. All activities I joined were almost in that place for a competition called Teruna Teruni Bali. On the quarantine day, my friends who were my competitors and I gathered in a Royal Boutique's meeting room for discussing the preparation that we should do. I lost my competition t-shirt and the committee took it as a small matter as I forgot it easily.

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gauravwalia1988 - / 14 4  
Mar 14, 2015   #2
My Thrilling Birth Day Birthday Surprise

My unforgettable experience happened in my birth day surprise several months ago in Royal Boutique.It all came on December 20th, 2014 . I had an unforgettable birthday surprise a couple months ago on December 20, 2014.All activities I joined were almost in that place for a competition called Teruna Teruni Bali.It took place at Royal Boutique, where I was preparing for a competition called "Teruna Teruni Bali".On the quarantine dayWhen the day of the competition arrived , my friends who were my competitors and Imy friends and I gathered in a Royal Boutique's meeting room at Royal Boutiquefor discussingto discuss the preparation that we should do. I lost my competition t-shirt and, but the committee took it as a small matter asand I forgot it easily. All was going well until I got the crewsthe crew members asked me about the t-shirt. I was suddenly confused on what to say. The more they asked me, the more I felt nervous and guilty, since I had no any idea where it was. In the end, one of the committee membersdecided to give me choices whether he resign himself from the committee or I myself left as a non-active active participant.gave me the option that either he resigns or I quit the competition . In additionSince I had to quit the competition , I was not allowed to join any of the activities any moreanymore . I was completely shockedupsetas I felt how big my struggle for this competition and I had to leave because the lost t-shirtbecause I was dismissed for just losing the t-shirt . Finally,As I was leaving, they asked me to come forward and stand up. Everybody was silent, and all the situation changed into a surprisingly atmosphere when one of crewscrew members asked me softly "when is your birth day?", "When is your birthday?" I closed my eyes and tried to lock my mouth as I wanted to yell louder and louder. I heard my friends and committee cloppedclap their hands while they were singing a birth daybirthday song to me. I could not stop thinking for my small friends' caringcare and lovinglovefor me on my birth daybirthday . This will be kept in my heart forever. Thanks my friends!

Hey Komank, I am glad your story had a great ending. I added and re-arranged your sentences to bridge some gaps in your story and make it more grammatically correct.


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