Hi. everyone i just join to your website. i suppose to discuss the ways to go through IELTS examination. my drawback is writing and i cant make it in time when i was in the exam. i am here to advise ways to overcome that. right below there is my first essay.
TOPic : Long distance flights use more fuel than cars and bring pollution to the environment. we should discourage nonessential flights rather than limit the use of car. to what extend do you agree or disagree.
Environmental pollution is an alarming issue to mankind among the world citizen. Especially in the area of transportation , the emitted gas that produced from the cars and planes. Some people are of the opinion long distance flights should be limited in the concern of car consume less amounts of fuel than plane. Hence confine to drive is not essential in term of environment. Personally i strongly disagree with this point of view. In aspect of green, limitation and nonessential use of transportation is required to have a green lifestyle. It is the duty to every one on the planet.
To begin with, the world advocate for green environment. The transportation industry should to take their actions and reponsibilities. For the sake of everyone can breath fresh air. By ways of illustrations the world fuel consumption is consumed mostly on airplane and car. Even though flights burn more fuel than car and produce more pollutent in the air. Flight can not take all the responsibility in the light of polluting environment. The society would be lose balance, if environmental friendly policies and regulations did not take in charge of car. It is inevitable that governments should make a jointly effort to enforce rules in order to improve air and environment.
Secondly reduction in number of vehicle is remarkable way to cut average liters of petrol use per person. Laying up the price of fuels that make it inelastic to population is also a effective measure. What's more, construction of convienient public transport can discourage unnecessary travel.
To be concluded, breathing fresh air is not one's responsibility but every one.
Environmental pollution is an alarming issue toofamong the world citizen . Especially, in the area of transportation, the emitted gas that producedgenerated from the cars and planes. Some people are of the opinion long distance flights should be limited in the concern of car consuming less amounts of fuel than plane. Personally i am strongly disagree with this point of view. In aspect of green, limitation and nonessential use of transportation is required. i didn't understand what it means.
man kind's
mankind is one word "mankind" which means human race without any reference to a particular sex.
Especially in the area of transportation , the emitted gas that produced from the cars and planes.
... this sentence is not complete. :(
Personally i am strongly disagree
... wrong grammar -
I am agreeing / I agreeI strongly disagreeIn aspect of green, limitation and nonessential use of transportation is required. It is the duty to every one on the planet.
It is nicer if you concluded your essay with a sentence that expresses your opinion on the issue.
In aspect of green, limitation and nonessential use of transportation is required
do you mean this sentence is not completed??
Environmental pollution is an alarming issue tomankind among the world citizen
... mankind makes the world citizen redundant.
Especially in the area of transportation , the emitted gas that produced from the cars and planes.
...still it is incomplete. Let's fix that problem;
Especially in the area of transportation, the gases emitted by cars and planes contribute largely to this issue.dumi, apreciate to show me the strcuture of the essay introduction.
it is pretty vague to me, could you show me some essay examples that make me figure in out easily! thanks
it is pretty vague to me, could you show me some essay examples that make me figure in out easily! thanks
Ok, let's construct your introduction (this essay) as per the structure :)
Long distance flights use more fuel than cars and bring pollution to the environment. we should discourage nonessential flights rather than limit the use of car. to what extend do you agree or disagree.
Air pollution is one of the biggest threats that we face today which can cause diseases and impair our health. (your hook).
The poisonous gases discharged from all kinds of vehicles are one of the major reasons for air pollution. The long distance flights that consume much larger quantities of fuel in contrast what is consumed by automobiles are believed to be causing more damage to the air than automobiles. Therefore, some people view that we should discourage air travel for non essential purposes rather than attempting to control the usage of automobiles(the background with what you introduce the context of the issue to your reader)
In my opinion, I agree with this view partially (this is the thesis statement - tell your opinion there)
thank you very much! you are very good at that. i am just curious, do you have any of your essay? i hope i can read more and i thought i finally meet someone i can learn from.
Well, I have only one essay on EF which I wrote just for fun :D ...LOL
When I wrote it I didn't have any idea about IELTS or TOEFL and it was not written for that purpose. This is it: essayforum.com/writing-feedback-3/science-vs-religion-best-people-44857/
However, you can get a knack of this structure if you read these two essays.
Hope they'll be helpful for you :)
eddies [Contributor]
25 / 1,208 
476 This is very simple conclusion. If you could, try to follow this structure for the concluding paragraph:
Secondly reduction in number of vehicle is a remarkable way to cut average liters of petrol used by aper person. Laying upIncreasing the price of fuelsfuel that make it inelastic to population is also a effective measure. What's more, construction of convienientconvenient public transport can discourage unnecessary travel.
