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Topic: A time you have the courage to do something or face something difficult


boxu53 2 / 4  
Jul 29, 2011   #1
Topic:

In his play, The Admirable Crighton, J.M. Barrie wrote, "Courage is the thing. All goes if courage goes." Write an essay about a time in your life when you had the courage to do something or face something difficult, or when you feel you fell short. What did you learn from the experience?

Essay:

When we encounter some people doing illegal things, what shall we do? As everybody may encounter some people doing illegal things, we should have the courage to stop them from destroying the peace of our society. I remember one time when I was a high school student having the courage to fight with a person who was doing illegal things, and this experience means a lot to me.

When I was a high school student, there was a book store near my home. The book store manager made much money from selling illegal books and DVD movies in which there were a lot of naked men and women having sex. Many young children were living in that area, and when these people buy these illegal books or DVD movies, it did a lot harm to them since they were no longer interested in any school books, and their brain were filled with dirty minds. As the book store manager did his "business" cautiously, the book store avoided being suspended by the city's security, and he kept making money by selling a lot of illegal books and DVD movies.

As I noticed that his illegal behavior will greatly do harm to all the people in our living area, especially for young adults who may not able to control themselves not to be allured by these illegal books and DVD movies, I decided to fight with him and try to contribute what I can do to serve the society. Admittedly, I was not strong enough to beat him, and I myself could not stop his illegal behavior, I should have the courage to fight against such illegal behavior. I made a plan to expose his illegal behavior.

Filled with great courage, I brought some money from home and directly went to the book store. I looked around and tried to find some illegal books and DVD movies. Surprised, I found all the books on the shelf are legal books such as scientific fictions, dictionaries, or test preparation. "Has he turned to be a good person and has stopped selling illegal books and DVD movies?" I asked myself. "No, the store manager is a cautious person, he must have hided all the illegal books and DVD movies so as to avoid being examined by the city securities." As I thought, I came to the store manager and pretended to be extremely disappointed and said, "Hey, I remember you did sell many 'exciting' books before, I really want to buy some." "There is not!" The store manager rudely replied, "Go away, right now!"

I was really frightened as that time. I thought he may have noticed my purpose for coming to the book store, and he may even beat me. I was about to go out and run away, but I remembered what The Admirable Crighton, J.M. Barrie had wrote in his play, "Courage is the thing. All goes if courage goes." So I calmed down, and decided to test him. I took out 100RMB, pretended to be disappointed again and said, "I thought you had some 'exciting books'. My friends told me to buy these books here and I was about to buy a lot."

As he stared at my money and looked around, he might think I was not a threat but just a young child, and he really could not miss the chance to earn much money. So he brought me to another room. WOW, all the books on the shelf have a naked woman as the cover. "Get as many as you want." As the store manager said, I rapidly bought some illegal books and DVD movies and went out of the book store. Then, I directly ran to the police department and showed all the evidence for his illegal behavior to the policemen. Several minutes later, I saw the book store was suspended and the book store manager was caught.

Although there are illegal people and illegal things around us, we should have the courage to do our best to fight against these illegal people and things. From my own experience, I learned that if we keep being silence, we can never stop these illegal people doing illegal things, and it is my courage to fight against illegal people and things that helped me to stop the book store manager from selling more illegal books and DVD movies or continuously do harm to the young adults or even the society.

spoontzc 2 / 6  
Jul 29, 2011   #2
Although there are illegal people and illegal things around us, we should have the courage to do our best to fight against these illegal people and things. From my own experience, I learned that if we keep being silence, we can never stop these illegal people doing illegal things, and it is my courage to fight against illegal people and things that helped me to stop the book store manager from selling more illegal books and DVD movies or continuously do harm to the young adults or even the society.

a little repetition?

perhaps u need some more thesaurus to help make ur lexical resources increasingly amplified.

illegal=======committing crimes criminal innocent sin culprit offenders offence stain people who break the law

Even there are still unreasonable and illegal things exist in the world, it is our responsibility to fight against these crimes without hesitation. From my own experience, I learned that silence never prevent any law-breaking actions but make it worse. I took courage to stop the bookstore manager going on selling books and DVDs no matter whether he is aware of relevant law or not, thereby keeping him from corrupting more teenagers and adults.
OP boxu53 2 / 4  
Jul 29, 2011   #3
Thank you so much! Your advice helps me a lot!
EF_Kevin 8 / 13,334 129  
Jul 31, 2011   #4
You have a great style of writing!
I want to show you how to keep the verb tense consistent in the sentnece:
Many young children were living in that area, and when people bought these illegal books or DVD movies, it did a lot of harm to them since they were no longer interested in any school books, and their brains were filled with dirty images.---I made a few small changes in this sentence.

Filled with great courage, I brought some money from home and directly went to the book store.---Great sentence!

I looked around and tried to find some illegal books and DVD movies.---Another great sentence.

Surprised, I found that all the books on the shelf were legal books, such as scientific fictions, dictionaries, or test preparation.---Keep the verb tense consistent.

...must have hidden...

:-)
OP boxu53 2 / 4  
Jul 31, 2011   #5
To EF_Kevin,

Thank you for giving me these advice. Do you think this essay can pass the CBEST Writing? I will keep my writing style if it is good.


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