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Topic 1: Traditional food is undergoing great changes and being replaced by new diets.

Tamia 1 / 3 2  
Mar 2, 2018   #1
Topic 1: Traditional food is undergoing great changes and being replaced by new diets. What do you think are the reasons and what do you think about this?

more imported food, less local cuisine?

With the multicultural integration, foreign cuisine takes an essential role in contributing to the diversity of that of one nation. It is inevitable that there will be a tendency of home- country food losing common preference due to the appearance of other new diets.

Initially, this trend is accelerating in the result of the alteration of residents' appetites. Conventional food has been attached to the history and culture - factors that define the character of a society - since the early age. More or less, it is getting mundane to have these dishes on frequent occasions, esp. national holiday,.. so revolutionary diets are in need no matter what. At the same time, new diets with an innovative style of cooking and absolute time - saving capture all appetites immediately. This dietary with flavourful taste is undoubtedly more preferable than complex traditional ones.

As a matter of fact, imported cuisine from the outsiders enhances the variety of food culture of a continent. However, if people adopt these renovations without embracing the original cuisine of their country, it will rapidly sink into oblivion. Besides, foreign diets also introduce fast food which accounts for obesity and other severe diseases if being misused. Nowadays, according to its convenience and tasty flavor, junk food satisfies many people from the young to the adults, from students to workers who have irregular working hours.

In a nutshell, imported food has its benefits and it is people that decide if conventional dishes are forgotten or not. People have to learn how to balance their diets between two types of food consumption, adore the beauty of other nations' cuisine and maintain the long-term value of conventional food.

Oscar Tam 2 / 3 2  
Mar 3, 2018   #2
I would like to provide little bit suggestion. To 2nd paragraph, the innovative style of food culture is saving all appetites and more preferable than complex traditional ones. But I suggest that you may also consider the cost of the food since it is another main reason why attracting the entrepreneur to open such type of restaurant, with catering the taste of the customers.

To the 3rd paragraph, it also can mention more about the healthy diet trending which has been held nowadays, comparing the traditional one and the imported one. Which diet can be more attractive according to the lifestyle currently. This may make the article more persuasive due to the more perspective consideration.
Holt [Contributor] - / 7,323 1847  
Mar 7, 2018   #3
Thanh, your essay does not sound like it has complete sentences. These seem more like signal phrases without the actual topic included in each line. The thought process you currently have is confusing to follow. I do not think you really outlined this essay before you started writing it. It is important that you outline your 5 paragraph topic sentences before you start writing otherwise you end up with incomplete presentations that will directly affect your C&C and GRA scoring potential. If you cannot clearly explain yourself in English, as proven in this essay, then you will not get a passing score in that section and thus, lower your overall final score to a point where it might not pass. More importantly, you should never abbreviate your spelling as you did in the word "especially" by saying "esp." That shows a lack of knowledge of academic English writing rules and will reduce your GRA score even further. While you have the potential to write a good essay, you will not be able to write an essay worthy of consideration of you do not work on improving your English thought process and presentation skills.
OP Tamia 1 / 3 2  
Mar 12, 2018   #4
@Oscar Tam
Thank you for your advice. It has a good point in your idea that I haven't thought of.

@Holt Thank you for your detailed comment. Can you explain further about the part that my essay seem not to have complete sentences please? I don't understand that much. Do you have any advice for me to fix thí problem?

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