Unanswered [21] | Urgent [0]

Home / Writing Feedback % width Posts: 2

IELTS task 2 Topic: a well-prepared strength and fitness vs mental training in sports competition

qmai170804 1 / -  
Oct 4, 2021   #1


Some people claim that mental strength is more important for success in sports. Others believe that it is more important for sportspeople to be strong and fit. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

It is sometimes argued that preparing mental toughness is superior to physical strength. There could be several reasons why this is the case, and I believe that it is necessary to have a strong body and health due to its huge impact on the improvement of success rate.

Granted, one might argue that mental strength would be necessary if sports participants want to win the competition. According to this theory, it is proven by psychologists that participants with weaker health can still win the competition if they have well-made strategies, such as analysing the weakness of rivals or finding out smart ways to win the match without using too much strength. This is also predicated on the assumption that the mentality of sportsmen plays a vital role when practicing. For instance, people who have a fear of water can hardly join swimming even though they have excellent physical health. By observing thoroughly and preparing a stable mind, lacking mentality is not a problem for sportsmen.

Having said that, this line of reasoning is not sound since great strength of mind is not enough for participants to win others. Since in sports such as basketball or football, players have to meet high standards such as over 180 centimeters height or having no health problems. To take the World Cup for example, it can be witnessed that there were no Asian teams being able to win the first prize, because footballers in these areas are generally shorter and weaker than European ones. Although it is true that having a stable mentality can increase the success rate for competitors, players can still be low-spirited when they actually meet rivals with huge differences in physical fitness. By contrast, competitors who have better strength are more confident, which results in a great mental and physical condition.

To conclude, a well-prepared strength and fitness in a sports competition is irreplaceable since it prevents huge differences in sportsmen, which leads to greater mental condition and more opportunities to win the match. (334 words)
Holt  Educational Consultant - / 11,749 3795  
Oct 7, 2021   #2
is superior to physical strength

In what instance? The restatement is incomplete not having referred to the subject of the discussion which is sports. The topic introduction lacked substance in relation to the reasons provided since there was no central topic provided.

Okay. Here is the main problem with your presentation. You are using a personal opinion for both reasons in each paragraph. The preferred format is to have the writer consider the public opinion first. Present 2 sentences representing the public, then use a transition sentence to connect these to your 2 sentence personal opinion. Yes, this is a comparative discussion presentation. Do not convert it to a personal opinion presentation alone. Use proper pronouns for differentiation and grammar accuracy. Consider why the public supports each opinion then agree or disagree with it.

Home / Writing Feedback / IELTS task 2 Topic: a well-prepared strength and fitness vs mental training in sports competition