Unanswered [2] | Urgent [0]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width Posts: 4

Transported goods in the UK - IELTS Writing Task 1 - The Line Graph


minhthu0707 1 / 1  
Oct 5, 2020   #1
I'm so glad if someone could spend time on my writing task. Thank you in advance.

Transport via water, road, rail and pipeline



The line graph compares four transports in terms of the numbers of the commodities that they conveyed over a period 28 years in the UK.

It's clear that the total number of transported goods in the UK rose significantly between 1974 and 2002. In particular, a much smaller products shipped by rail in comparison with water, pipeline and road experienced the fastest growth in transport usage.

In 1974, around 70 million tonnes of goods were transported by road mode. The pipeline was in the bottom at 5 million tones, while the water and rail types stood at just under 40 million tones. Delivering by pipeline, water and road rose slightly in 1978, whereas the use of the rail for shipment dropped negligibly.

By 2002, the goods conveyed by road reached approximately 100 million tones, a considerably of almost 30 million tones. The figure shows the numbers of commodities transported by rail were almost unchangeable, while the of pipeline and water were higher, at about 21 and 63 million tones, respectively.




Holt [Contributor] - / 9,765 3095  
Oct 6, 2020   #2
Your summary overview should be divided into individual sentences. Identify the line graph, its representations, measurements, and year references as individual sentences. This should cover at least 4 sentences in your presentation. Make sure to attach the single sentence trending statement when you can. While you may use a stand alone trending statement, you need to have a minimum of 3 sentences in that presentation to meet the minimum sentence requirement. That should also help you write about 190 words, which is the maximum word count for this essay.

Your last paragraph is missing a comparison discussion. That is, the reference to the overlapping measurement in 1978 for water and rail. Your current presentation is good enough, but lacking in certain aspects. Some will say that missing out on the comparative element will lower your score, I tend to believe that it will lower the score but not significantly, provided you thoroughly presented, analyzed, and explained the other information in the essay.
twhin 3 / 6 1  
Oct 7, 2020   #3
The first paragraph should be a paraphrase of the question and an overview including the time period, involved country, the type of graph etc.

For example:
Given is a line chart comparing the amount of goods transported by 4 types of transportations in Britain from 1974 to 2002, a 28-year period. It is evident that the usage of all transportation modes increased considerably during this time frame, except for rail.

As for 2 or 3 paragraph, it is more ideal to make a comparison on the trend of different transportations. Eg. The usage of pipeline rose consistently while that of road saw considerable fluctuations at somewhere between...

Hope this helps!
OP minhthu0707 1 / 1  
Oct 8, 2020   #4
@Holt
@twhin
Thank you so much for your help, I'll certainly improve it!


Home / Writing Feedback / Transported goods in the UK - IELTS Writing Task 1 - The Line Graph