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Is it true that being innovative and independent gives you a better chance to get an awesome job?

IvanMS027 43 / 56 9  
Nov 30, 2016   #1
Some people think when recruiting, companies should aim to take on people who are innovative and able to work independently while others considered they should recruit people who are able to work in a team and follow instructions. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

When we are going to be interviewed, we are often asked what the real personality of ours is. Sometimes, we afraid that our character will not match with the company. There is an opinion that company hires the person having innovation and independence, while others say that people who can collaborate and strict to the instruction are more likely to be employed. In my own perspective, it depends on the kinds of works, and this essay will first discuss the views of working independently that can lead to finish the work faster, followed by working in a team that will lead to make the clear instruction.

First of all, people having innovative ideas are able to make a brand new thing that can be useful for company. It is important for company focusing on selling goods to the public. For people working independently, the time they need to resolve the company's problem is also shorter. Research conducted by Mr. Fujinuma Satoru from Beijing University has also proved that they can consume 27 percent of time shorter than others. However, owing to the fact that they depend on their own thinking, they do not frequently overcome the problem's core.

People that can work in a team and follow the instruction sometimes consume the time longer since the debates are often seen. However, because more employees' minds are involved, obstacles facing by industries are solved precociously, and brainstorming resulted by long debates gives one clearly solution. In my opinion, the company has own typical workers they need. For example, advertising company is more likely to hire innovative person while the statistical company tends to choose the people having ability to work together in the same team.

All in all, I briefly believe that the different job will lead to different requirements of workers able to solve the company's obstacle. Furthermore, employees having innovative and independent characters attract the company needing innovation while others need workers that can follow the employers' plan.

(329 Words)

ichanpants89 [Contributor] 16 / 777 309  
Nov 30, 2016   #2
Here's my analysis towards your IELTS task 2 essay. I hope you can follow through.

1st paragraph:
- In this paragraph, I suggest you to minimize the usage of first person point of view. It is not entirely wrong to use first person point of view, but I might say that if you over-use them, the format of your essay will be less academic. You are suggested to use first person point of view only when you want to argue about certain topic or deliver a statement/argument. In this case, "In my own perspective,.." is okay, but "when 'we' are going to be..., 'we' are often..." somehow is inappropriate. Try to switch them become "people (if it is a general idea) / some people (if it has two possible sides).

2nd paragraph:
- Then, I can notice that in this paragraph, you accidentally forgot to give a clear reason why your idea is preferable. Remember that you need to fully support your idea if you want to reach band 6 or above. An idea that is not sufficiently developed is one of the criteria of band 5 in terms of Task Response. Also, you are suggested to mind your vocabulary usage. For instance, resolve and solve are different. Prefix Re- means that it shows a "repetition" of a particular activity. Therefore, solve = simply solve the problem while re-solve = solve the problem for a second time. It might look simple but this is one of the essential criteria in Lexical Resource.

Hope this helps :)

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