TASK 2 : Nowadays, it is true that the modern lifestyle can influence health of students

MANY CHILDREN THESE DAYS HAVE AN UNHEALTHY LIFESTYLE. BOTH SCHOOLS AND PARENTS ARE RESPONSIBLE FOR SOLVING THIS PROBLEM. TO WHAT EXTENT DO YOU AGREE WITH THIS STATEMENT?

Nowadays, it is true that the modern lifestyle can influence health of students. Many children spend their time to check social media in their gadget. As a result, this activity encourages them lazy to do some exercises. Furthermore, consuming the cigarettes is more likely trend surroundings the modern teenagers. I completely agree that schools and parents should endeavor to clear up this issue.

One of the bad habits which are evident in children is smoking. They assume that if they do not consume these items, it will be judged as outdated person. Parents and academic institutions should give guidance about the dangerous of these unhealthy foods to them. Children have to change their habit and try to consume more healthy food. Because of that, parents must provide all of healthy food such as some vegetables and fruit in home. As a result, their body gets much nutrition and vitamins.

The other unhealthy lifestyle is that children much enjoy playing smartphone all the times. As a consequence, they more focus on their gadget than spend a little time physical activities. Parent should control their children's time to play smartphone and force them to do some exercise regularly. Schools can play a predominant role here with emphasize them in order to children always participate in sports subject and do all of physical educations.

To sum up, I believe that both of academic institutions and parents have obligation to increase children's health. They can resolve these problems with their own ways to make them healthier than before.

Hi pertiwi02
Let me correct your writing.

One of the bad habits which are IS evident in children is smoking. ... consume these items, it THEY will be judged as outdated person. HANCE, Parents and academic (...) unhealthy foods to them . Children have to IN ORDER TO change their habit ... Because of that MOROFER, parents must provide all ... As a result , THEREBY, their body WILL get much nutrition and vitamins.

IT HAD BETTER VOCUS ON YOUR WRITING IN JUST ONE PROBLEM UNHAELTHY LIVESTYLE (CONSUMING CIGARRETTES OR PLAYING SMARTPHONE INSTEAD). PAY ATTENTION IN CONNECTOR EACH PARAGRAPH, USE THE PROPER CONNECTOR.