Unanswered [12] | Urgent [0]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width Posts: 2


It is true that salary is a crucial factor for numerous people opting for a job


pinkey123 1 / -  
Jan 6, 2021   #1

when choosing a job, the salary is the most important consideration



It is true that salary is a crucial factor for numerous people opting for a job. While I accept that this may fit a lot of job seekers, I do believe that they should ponder not only salary level but also other features.

On the one hand, salary is essential for everyone to survive. We all need money in order to afford our living standards such as housing, food, bills, and so on. Hence, without salary, you could pay for none of your basic demands. Moreover, this aspect is also a great motivation for us to pursue our dream. Being paid reasonably can make you feel satisfied with your work and have enough money to carry on your desire. For instance, an artist needs a good payment to purchase drawing equipment to paint gorgeous articles.

On the other hand, some other categories need to be considered when selecting a career. First, the working condition is an extremely important thing to be noticed. The state of the facilities, environment, or even your colleagues. Obviously, we are unable to work in a place with noise from vehicles or machines. Moreover, being in a building having a shortage of amenities like air- conditioner, computer, or working with uncooperative, indolent colleagues prevent you from concentrating. As a result, your productivity will easily decline significantly. Furthermore, many people tend to choose a stable job. The reason why a large number of employees do not want to alter their occupation is the lack of ability to adapt new environment. For example, some people might feel problematic to move to a different area or make friends.

In conclusion, there is no doubt that money is fundamental for various people when opting for their career, however, there are more aspects which are as valuable as salary in the job decision.

*** Can someone mark this essay, and tell me how to improve it? ***
Thank you
Holt  Educational Consultant - / 14,835 4783  
Jan 7, 2021   #2
Nobody should mark your essay here. A student who dares to mark your essay will find his account suspended. Scoring or, as you call it, marking, is part of our premium services which you have to acquire privately from us.

This is an extent essay. Therefore, stating information in the first sentence as "true" creates a prompt deviation on your part. The first deviation, is offering an opinion as a fact when it is not required and second, you do not offer a measured response in relation to the original prompt. Compare the original presentation to the one you have in this post and you will easily understand why your essay will receive a non passing score for this presentation:

Original Topic: When choosing a job, the salary is the most important consideration. ( No claim of truthfulness or validity is being made, only a statement of the topic)

Your Topic: It is true that salary is a crucial factor for numerous people opting for a job. ( Factual statement is claimed which runs counter to the mere statement originally offered.)

Discussion Question: To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Response: While I accept that this may fit a lot of job seekers, I do believe that they should ponder not only salary level but also other features. (Reasoning statement is provided without a measured response indicated.)

There is a lack of clarity in your response as there is no clear opinion presented based upon the measured response requirement. There is no midway point in this presentation that will allow you to agree and disagree with both implied sides of the discussion. Which is it? It appears that you disagree with the statement based on the reason you provided. You should have indicated a disagreement in response to the question, then added the reason for your disagreement as having other consideration points other than simply the salary a job offers. It is that point of view that will require 2 supporting reasons in the discussion presentation.


Home / Writing Feedback / It is true that salary is a crucial factor for numerous people opting for a job
Writing
Editing Help?
Fill in one of the forms below to get professional help with your assignments:

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Best Essay Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳