Everyone should become vegetarian because they do not need to eat meat to have a healthy diet. Agree or disagree
There is currently a contentious argument over whether the vegetarian diet is more beneficial for health than eating meat. I somewhat agree with this idea because the following reasons.
The main reason why I agree that raising many poultry and cattle to supply food for humans is unnecessary is because vegetable and cereal contain vitamins, minerals, proteins, and vital others which are sufficient to maintain life functions for humans. To illustrate, people could replace cow's milk with soy milk to implement Calcium and still ensure that the quality and the content of Calcium derived from the bean is equivalent to the ones in animals.
The second reason why I support the notion that eating some kinds of meat could be harmful to health is due to the consumption of meat is associated with an increased risk of cancer as well as heart disease. For example, saturated fat which is found in beef and pork causes the cancers of breast and colon. Moreover, methods of cooking meat at high temperature would create toxic compounds, this leads to not only nutrient loss but also unwanted health consequences such as cardiovascular diseases.
However, pregnant women and children are not suitable for a vegetarian diet because the vegetable products could not meet their increased demand at that time. The lack of meat-derived nourishment in a daily meal would lead to malnutrition.
In conclusion, I partly agree that eating meat is unnecessary because vegetable consumption could supply nutritive substances inadequately for daily actions, and eating some kind of meat has a bad effect on health. However, pregnant woman and children need to eat meat to ensure that their body is not malnutrition.
Holt Educational Consultant - / 10,377 3372
The subject proposed for this prompt is not being presented in an argumentative form. It is presented as an opinion for your consideration, hence the agree or disagree question. As such, it should not be framed in an exaggerated manner such as a "contentious argument" as that is not the given discussion format. Such exaggerations do have an effect on your TA score, regardless of how minimal the deductions will be for it. Deductions still count in the end score. Now, since this not an extent essay, you cannot represent a partial agreement for this response either.
The format you have used for the overall response presentation is therefore incorrect and will force this essay to get a TA score based on a partially correct response due an incorrect format response. That is not going to help your overall score because you will not get a passing TA score at the very start, affecting the overall possibility of this essay gaining a passing mark.
You have opposing opinions presented in the overall discussion. Note that in the thesis statement, you indicated a partial agreement with the statement. Then, in the reasoning paragraph, you stated that you agree, without the word "partially", indicating a full agreement with the original statement. This creates an unclear opinion on your part, confusing the examiner in the process. The first two reasons that support the agreement is correct. This is not a comparison essay, nor is it an extent essay. So the singular point of view discussion should be used. The pregnant women part of the discussion will not be considered and will be deducted from your word count instead.
Your 277 word count will be reduced and the total word count will actually be 239 words. That means, a percentage of TA points will be be deducted due to the missing 11 words. There will be double lowering of points for you in the TA section, which could indicate that you will not get a passing score overall for this presentation.