The first type of germ is bacteria, which are defined as "organisms, microscopic in nature; they are unicellular and reproduce asexually." They are an ancient form of life, and most of them have spores that are resistant to dryness. Bacteria consist of single celled organisms. Scientists found a lot of facts after discovering the bacteria. First, different kinds of bacteria can live in high temperatures, icy places and trash. Second, from 500 to 1000 kinds of bacteria live in human bodies; some make disease and others give benefits. Third, there are countries that use bacteria in making cheese, yoghurt and sour dough bread. Fourth, 50% of bacteria produce oxygen. Finally, bacteria can help in cleaning up oil spills.
Bacteria are the most common way of getting diseases. For example, anthrax is "an acute infection disease caused by a bacterium that form spore. A spore is a cell that lie dormant, and comes to life under the right condition ." Anthrax normally come to animal and domestic like cattle, sheep and camel. When a person is exposed to an infected animal, he/she gets this type of disease. In addition, there are many ways to become infected with anthrax such as eating undercooked meat from infected animal and inhaling anthrax spores from contaminated animal products. About 20% of untreated cases of anthrax will result is death. Another examples of bacteria diseases are acne, gastritis, tonsillitis, tuberculosis and kidney infection.
To protect your body away from bacteria you have to wash your hand frequently, as in after going to the bathroom, after entering public place and after handling animal. In addition, try not to touch your mouth, nose and eyes because bacteria come in your body through these organs.
The second type of germ is viruses this type cannot survive and grow. Viruses cannot live for long outside others living cells. For example, they can stay for a short time as few seconds in bathroom and dirty places. Viruses can move from one person to another in high speed.
When quoting, be sure to cite the source of the quotation, either by naming the author in the sentence or by placing citation information in parentheses after the quote. Always, you will give the author's last name and the page number on which the quote appears. Some citation styles also require you to provide the year of publication. At the end of the essay, you provide more complete citation information, as required by the citation style that your instructor prefers.
So:
The first type of germ is bacteria, which are defined as "they are organisms, microscopes in nature; they are unicellular and reproduce asexually" (citation information).
Also, be very careful to reproduce the quotation accurately. I suspect that the quote uses the word "microscopic" rather than "microscopes."
Also, double-check your facts. 80% of all bacteria live in human bodies? That doesn't sound right to me.
In general, I'd like to see you take more care. Over and over I see errors such as "an ancient from life" when you mean "an ancient form of life" and "takes his sin to the doctor" when you mean "takes his son to the doctor." There are so many errors like this that I can't tell which are due to lack of knowledge -- in which case I want to help -- and which are due to sloppy proofreading, in which case all you need to do to correct the problem is to be more mindful. So, what I would like you to do is to proofread your piece very carefully and then post a cleaned-up version for us to critique.
thank you very much for your advice
I will correct the error then post it again
( Thanks for help )
Again, "an ancient from life" should be "an ancient form of life.
I see that, while your information is comprehensive and your organization is fine, you are struggling with verbs and plurals. So, in your study, focus on those areas. For this essay, here are a few correction you can make.
TheB acteria are the most common way of getting diseases.
When a person is exposed to an infected animal, he/she gets this type of disease . In addition, there are many ways to become infected
There are several ways people can keep themselves away from viral diseases.
The fungi kingdom includemany kinds such as the yeasts, molds, smuts and mushrooms.
The little child had his own dog, who was named Dopy.
The father went with his son to the doctor to diagnose his situation.
Also, I notice that you like to count when making your points. That's fine to do in moderation, but you should work on learning other ways of moving through lists of facts.
I think you should start the essay with a intriguing o shocking statement. That might make you want to read more and more about germs.
Here are some ideas:
I got them from this website:
library.spscc.ctc.edu/electronicreserve/eng9697/agar/11WaystoBeginanEssayand10WaystoEnd.pdf
Make sure you are using the words you mean to use. Simone already pointed out one case where you used "from" instead of "form." Here is another:
"Second, wear lose clothes and change your socks during high humility time." The word you actually want here is humidity . Otherwise, I wonder why my attitude would affect when I should wear socks.
It is the first time I write an essay,I know there are alot of mistakes .
thanks for help
I didn't get your point in this "an ancient from life" should be "an ancient form of life"
I correct what you told me ..
still there are errors?
( this is just the body of my essay )
Keep your pronouns consistent with your nouns. For example, "bacteria" is plural. So, "Finally, they can help in cleaning up oil spills."
This is a run on sentence:
"The second type of germ is viruses this type cannot survive and grow."
You need some form of punctuation, either a period or a semi-colon, between "viruses" and "this." Since the two phrases are not part of the same thought, I would choose a period and then capitalize "This."
"According to the scientists, one to three people die each year due to fungi."
And, again, don't forget to cite your sources. Every time you quote, you must say where the quote comes from. The only exception to this is if all of your quotes and facts come from the same source. Then you can explicitly state that you will be sharing information gleaned from that source, and that citation will carry through the essay.
They lived in small cottage, it was a wonderful cottage but the mushroom around it and the father did not know if its boredom or not.
Is there a variety of mushroom known as the boredom mushroom? Or have you picked the wrong word here? If the former, you should explain this. If the latter, use the name of the actual mushroom variety. Hint: Death cap mushrooms deserve their name.
EF_Simone
thanks 4 helping me
when I put my essay in essayrater.com to see the score, it didn't show becouse there are alot of mistakes
I am realy dissatisfied of that when I read it again and again I couldn't find any mistakes .
would you Please help me to highlight my mistakes then I will correct them .
There is an error in almost every sentence. This is why I asked you to go back and proofread, so that I could tell which errors were due to lack of knowledge and which due to carelessness.
First paragraph:
The first type of germ is bacteria, which are defined as "organisms, microscopic in nature; they are unicellular and reproduce asexually." They also are an ancient form of life, and most of them have spores that are resistant to dryness. Bacteria consist of s ingle celled organisms that what bacteria consist of . However, theS cientists found a lot of facts after discovering the bacteria. First, different kinds of bacteria can live in high temperatures , icy places and trashes . Second, from 500 to 1000 kinds of bacteria live in human bodies; some make disease and others give the benefits. Third, there are countries that use bacteria in making cheese, yoghurt and sour dough bread. Fourth, 50% of bacteria produce oxygen. Finally, bacteria can help in cleaning up oil spills.
Refresh your memory on articles and plurals. Then go back through your other paragraphs and see what errors you can find.
(There is an error in almost every sentence) oh my god , I will cry :"(
I will start paragraph by paragraph now ...
I will show it to u later...
Thanks alot ...
I wish every things is okey :(
Do not cry! Just take it step by step, and your writing will improve.
I notice that not much time elapsed between when you got the feedback and when you reposted the essay. That was not enough time to review your English learning materials for the rules about articles and plurals and then go sentence by sentence carefully.
So, I am continuing to think that one problem is that you are in too much of a hurry!
What you need to do -- just on the problem of plurals -- is to go through each sentence, looking at each noun and asking whether you have properly used the singular or plural form. If the noun is the subject of a sentence, then you must also check to make sure that the verb matches the noun -- singular noun with singular verb, plural noun with plural verb.
After doing that, you can start to think about punctuation, again reviewing your learning materials before going through your essay sentence by sentence.
So, for example, if you did that and then considered this sentence:
It is, consist of single cell and its tiny usually cannot see it without using a microscope.
you would see that the verb does not match the noun -- "it" is singular, "consist" is plural -- and you also have an extra verb in there. Is "it" proper? Yes, if it refers to a single protozoan parasite. Hmm... just to be sure your reader does not misunderstand, why not say "protozoan parasite" instead of "it"?
So, then you would have:
A protozoan parasiteis consists of single cell and its tiny usually cannot see it without using a microscope.
It is not correct yet! I said you should review articles. Just as we needed an "a" before "protozoan parasite," we need an "a" before "single cell."
So, then you would have:
A protozoan parasite consists of a single cell and its tiny usually cannot see it without using a microscope.
It's still not correct! Now we have to turn to punctuation. You have written "its" when you mean "it is." It's fine to use the contraction, but you must remember the apostrophe or the word has a different meaning. Also, you have combined two sentences into one, leaving out the subject of the second sentence.
Fixing all of those things, you would have
A protozoan parasite consists of a single cell, and it' s tiny; you usually cannot see it without using a microscope.
As you can see, that took a lot of time. This is why I would like to see you take a lot of time going over your sentences carefully, looking first at noun and their articles, then at verbs, and finally at punctuation, before posting the essay as revised.
today, I'm going to write the conclusion
what do you suggest for that ?
In your conclusion, you will want to summarize the kinds of germs you have discussed and perhaps restate the importance of protecting oneself.
Your essay might also benefit from an introduction. At the moment, you plunge right in to a discussion of bacteria, without really giving an overview of your essay that explains why you are taking about them.
back again ..
I relly need help I have to submit this essay tomorrow
would you please underline the errors then I will correct them
I need someone to correct the grammers in this part !! please :)
The first type of germ is bacteria, which are defined as "organisms, microscopic in nature; they are unicellular and reproduce asexually." They are (...)
To protect your body away from bacteria, you have to wash your hands frequently, especially after going to the bathroom, after entering public places and after handling animals .
As you can see from these corrections to a single sentence, you still need to attend carefully to the question of plurals. How many other instances can you find where you have used the singular when you ought to have used the plural?
I like the quotation you used. Perhaps you should cite it, according to whatever format you are supposed to be using?
