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IELTS Writing Task 1: Types of pollution


nimbus2k2 8 / 25 6  
Jul 7, 2019   #1
NOISE POLLUTION IN CITIES AND RURAL AREAS

Topic: The charts illustrate the number of people who were affected by 4 types of noise pollution in day and night in cities and rural areas in 2007. Summarize and make comparison where relevant.

The bar chart presents the number of residents in cities and rural areas affacted by four different kinds of noise pollution during daytime and nighttime in 2007.

Overall, city inhabitants were influenced by noise more than rural ones. The main source of noise came from the traffic.

Traffic noise during the day affected 64 million people living in cities, 30 million more than the number of citizens in rural areas affected. Nighttime traffic noise annoyed 48 million urban residents, doubled the number of rural ones. Noise pollution coming from train was a burden to 10 million and 8 million city residents in day and night respectively. For this category, the difference between the figures of city and rural areas was 2 million people for both day and night

Compared to traffic noise, noise of aircraft influenced 4 million people in cities and half that number in rural areas. At night the figures of two places were the same: 1 million. There were the least number of people disturbed by industrial noise. In big cities, the data was up to 1 million residents during daytime and even fewer at night, whereas rural inhabitants did not experience this type of noise.




solivagant 8 / 15 6  
Jul 7, 2019   #2
Hi @nimbus2k2!
I`ll try my best to help you!
Actually, I think your report is well-organized.
These are some corrections from me:

The main source of noise came from the is traffic.

...residents, doubled the number of which were twice as many as rural ones.

... and half of that number in rural areas.
OP nimbus2k2 8 / 25 6  
Jul 9, 2019   #3
@solivagant Thank you for the correction!
Maria [Contributor] - / 1,054 373  
Jul 10, 2019   #4
@nimbus2k2
Hello there.

I maye be a tad bit late, but I'll provide you with substantial feedback on your writing. I hope this will help you.

I think the first two paragraphs are put-together and alright. Try to just omit the usage of filler words.

As for the succeeding paragraphs, I suggest having a more structured approach to writing. For instance, your third paragraph's first sentence can be separated into two in order to curate a more dynamic writing style. Doing so will help you incorporate more of an organized approach to relaying the information in your text.

Additionally, be cautious of your lack of usage of punctuation as this can hinder the overall flow of your writing.

Best of luck as always. Come back for more feedback.
OP nimbus2k2 8 / 25 6  
Jul 12, 2019   #5
@Maria Thanks. I'll remember this for next time.


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