Unanswered [3] | Urgent [0]

Home / Writing Feedback   % width Posts: 6

understand the most important characteristics of a society = study of major cities

atabati 1 / 2  
Jul 14, 2013   #1
Hi all,
any comments regards to my essay, would be strongly appreciated by me, Thanks

The speaker attempts to create this claim that if we are going to the perceive the most critical and outstanding features of a society, we have to concentrate on studying the big cities in that society. Indeed, those important features which we are looking for finding about them, build the identification of the people in that society. Consequently, by studying the large cities we can target the main gatherings of communities and people in that society in our study.

First of all, if we want to study and understand the outstanding features of a society, a very effectual and handy way is to focus our attention to the large parts of that society in forms of basic communities, organizations and different kinds of capitals which are mostly entrenched in large cities and also plays an influential role in the society. For example, in most countries like Iran or Italy, there are cities which are known as the caches and homes for religion, such as Qom and Mashhad in Iran. These cities in most of the time, are some of large ones which are also known as religious capitals of related countries or regions. If we pay our attention to them, not only we can find out those important features about the religious believes among people of that society, but also there are always some special behaviors and conventions which were established around those cities, which now there is an opportunity to learn about them too.

In addition to the previous example, we can state the same issue about the governmental, economical and political communities in a society. There are special large cities which are known as the main place of one or some of these communities, which are behoove us to allot our time on discovering different information about them. Because lots of important characteristics of a society are created in direct or indirect influences of economical, governmental and political factors.

Furthermore, starting an analysis over conceiving cardinal characteristics of a society requires us to find appropriate gatherings of people, those who have active interactions among themselves, in result of that we can find the high chance of understanding the most common and important behaviors among them. In fact, these behaviors are the factors creating our intended features. On the other hands, in small cities, there is a small chance of finding that fitting interaction between people which is more observable in some countries like Canada. In canada, you can find a tranquil cities , filled from peaceful moments, because most of people usually prefer to spend their free time in a more crowded and different areas like the country sides of capitals cities.

Despite the whole reasons and examples which I stated about them, there is an undeniable fact about small cities which can be telling of the target we are directing to it. This fact is that depending to the customs of different countries, there are societies which those old cultural events and conventional behaviors are stayed alive among them, and we can find out less of them in big cities. However, this is not the case in all countries.

In conclusion, I want to express that if we allot our main focus and time for our study on some targeted and big cities in the intended society, there would be more possibility for us to achieve the goal of understanding those projecting features of that society.

jkjeremy - / 380 72  
Jul 14, 2013   #2
Is this for a test? If so, which one?

What's the essay question---not in your words but EXACTLY as it was originally phrased?
OP atabati 1 / 2  
Jul 14, 2013   #3
it is issue type of AWA (writing section) n GRE general test, it is my response to one the common sample questions in the website of ets

To understand the most important characteristics of a society, one must study its major cities.

Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the statement and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, you should consider ways in which the statement might or might not hold true and explain how these considerations shape your position.
jkjeremy - / 380 72  
Jul 14, 2013   #4
To understand the most important characteristics of a society, one must study its major cities.

Okay...I'm going to ask a few questions:

1. Is the statement above true or false?

2. Give me ONE reason why.

3. Give me a SECOND reason why.

4. Give me a THIRD reason why.

Limit each answer to exactly one sentence.
OP atabati 1 / 2  
Jul 14, 2013   #5
sry for the length of my sentences.
I think it's a positive vision.
1-large organization, community and gathering of people in visions of religion, economic, business, politics and government issue, all either exist in a large city or create a large component in that society, therefore has a great impact in formation of important features in that society.

2- knowing about important features in a society requires us to find a nice interaction of people which can be found in most of the times in a better way in large cities, specifically in some countries which there is only a peaceful environment in small towns with lack of communications between people.

3- my concession point is that some conventions of the society may stay alive and in a better condition in small and rural areas depending in which country we are talking about, but in regard to all factors, I imagine choose of big cities is nice.
jkjeremy - / 380 72  
Jul 14, 2013   #6
my concession point

I didn't ask for a "concession point."

What you've given me is a good start, but it's far too wordy.

Give me three DIFFERENT reasons why we need to study major cities.

This time, write only in sentence fragments. I want no more than ten words for each.

I'm having you do this because the first draft of your essay lacks coherence.

If you are unable to do this, let me know.

Home / Writing Feedback / understand the most important characteristics of a society = study of major cities