TOEFL: Why go to university? It is important for our future.

for most of us it's crucial to finish an university

Going to a university is an important stage in our life. Because it is a place where we can cultivate knowledge and prepare essential skills to join the workforce. Many people argue that you don't have to go to a college or a university to get a job. But I don't believe that. In my opinion, entering university is an excellent decision for two important reasons.

The main reason is that you need to enrich your knowledge. Because in high school, you only learn fundamental knowledge. You don't have chance to study it in depth. At a university, they have facilities and many talented professors who will support you and help you discover various subjects. One of my best friends, Tuan, is an industrious student. He learns Math at University of Science. He told me that thanks to his professor he now know that mathematic has countless applications in the real world. He said he didn't get it at high school but he actually ascertain it at university. Knowledge is powerful. You can't crave knowledge without attending a university.

There is another reason that deserve some words here. Studying at a university enable us to prepare some crucial skills which you need to cope with problem in your life. You will learn how to interact with other people who have different backgrounds. You can also learn how to manage your finance, how to become independence... Those skills are very important for you to be a successful person in the future. As you can see, you only acquire those skills at a university where it is taught.

In sum, though some may advocate some individuals such as Bill Gate who droped out Harvard University. I strongly believe that most of us will can't obtain enough knowledge or prepared skills if we don't go to a university. If you want to pursuit of your dream, I think the best way is to go to university.

Dao, in proper written grammar, you cannot use the words "Because" and "But" to start a sentence because it is a word that is used to connect two separate ideas in one sentence. It is a connecting word and as such, should never be placed at the start of a sentence since there are no words or thoughts to connect to one another in that instance. You must also avoid using ellipses, the 3 successive periods, in an academic essay. The ellipses are best used in creative writing in order to signify connected thoughts in an imaginative manner. This is an academic essay. Therefore, the writing must always be straightforward and as informative as possible. Although there are some major grammatical problems in your essay, the fact remains that the reasoning you wrote, specially the one based upon your friend's experience, has helped the essay discussion become informative and authoritative. It showed that you have a thorough understanding of the English prompt and how it is to be discussed. So I can safely say that you did a good job in developing this essay, even though thee are some grammar problems located within the essay. It did not take the focus of the reader away from the prompt discussion, even as it sometimes caused stress for the reader.

@Holt
Thank you so much for your help. I'll try my best to correct mistakes I made in this essay.
Have a good day.
Sincere