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[TOEFL] Why go to a university - reasons for education


YuChiehQin 1 / 1  
Jan 31, 2018   #1
People attend college or university for many different reasons (for example, new experiences, career preparation, increased knowledge). Why do you think people attend college or university? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

higher education - for whom and what for?



People may choose to pursue higher education for multiple reasons. For starters, higher education provides a way to learn more skills, and acquire new knowledge. Moreover, studying in college or university allows you to interact with people from different background but with similar interests. It broadens your mind and helps you set up your own professional network. Additionally, having graduated from a renowned school enhances you credibility when applying for a job. Below are some examples to illustrate these reasons.

Colleges and universities consist of a wide range of different departments, each provides a path to professional knowledge in a certain field. Students are able to learn the most updated theory, information, paradigms and approaches through lecture, presentation, group discussion, and many other ways. It is more cost effective and efficient than looking for all the answers by yourself. Also, some great ideas may emerge during this process. Schools that are vocational-oriented may focus on helping students acquire skills for specific jobs. That is also very efficient compared to learning job skills by yourself.

Studying with classmates, schoolmates, professors, instructors, teaching assistants...are more beneficial than studying alone because you can gain different insights through interpersonal interaction. You may have to communicate, explain, go on the stage and present, and listen actively to what other people say. These interactions will all help you with a more flexible and broadened mind. People you meet in college or university, may become your business partner or lifelong friends in the future.

Apart from learning new skills and interpersonal interaction, when applying for jobs, one can demonstrate their credibility quickly and easily by presenting a copy of graduation certificate from an accredited college or university. The employer and other related parties will not need to worry about checking each candidate's background as much with this certificate. It shortens the amount of time needed to screen candidates and gives a rough idea of the educational background of a potential future employee. Given the above reasons and examples, people choose to attend colleges and universities my be because of learning opportunities, professional networking, and social credibility.
Holt  Educational Consultant - / 14,767 4770  
Jan 31, 2018   #2
Qin, I am afraid that because you wrote more than 300 words, that you are not leaving yourself with enough time to truly write a meaningful essay for scoring considerations. You will already get a chance to gain the maximum possible score for a 300 word essay within 15-20 minutes. You need to make sure that you leave enough time for you to review your essay. It is more important to write a clear and understandable essay than it is to write a extremely long and wordy essay. Wordiness has drawbacks in terms of keeping the focus of your essay on topic. Sometimes, in an effort to prove the extent of your English vocabulary, you end up just typing for the heck of it, regardless of the relevance of the words you are using in terms of the given discussion. That is vocabulary trap you can avoid if you focus on writing up to 300 words only.

Your essay is well developed. I will admit that the grammar needs work in some sections so running this essay through an online proofreader should help you learn how to address the word usage issues in your essay. Overall, it is a strong discussion that follows a logical thought process. You can improve the transition sentences to include keywords that would help describe the topic of the next discussion. For example, "... job skills by yourself. The presence of friends, other students and teachers help prepare a person for an office interactive environment."

Save for these concerns, I would say with confidence that you have a very good chance of getting a higher than average score in your TOEFL test. Keep practicing and good luck!
OP YuChiehQin 1 / 1  
Feb 2, 2018   #3
@Holt

Thanks a lot for your feedback. I took some actions in response to it:

1. I bought a proofreading tool after one day of trial. It is really helpful!

2. I made some amendments. However, I couldn't make it to just 300 words, always 280 or 320.

Answer v.2>>

People pursue higher education for multiple reasons. For starters, it provides a way to acquire skills and knowledge. Secondly, it allows you to interact with people from different backgrounds, hence broadens your mind and connects you with professional network. Moreover, having graduated from an accredited institution builds credibility on your resume, even more so if it's a renowned school. Below are some examples to illustrate these reasons.

Learning new skills through organized courses will help you faster than looking for all the answers by yourself. Each department specializes in one discipline. Students can learn the most updated theory and knowledge through lecture, presentation, group discussion, and so on. Additionally, inspiring ideas could emerge during this process. On the other hand, Vocational colleges focus on preparing students to be job-ready.

Studying with classmates, professors and teaching assistants will help you gain various insights through interpersonal interaction. You may have to communicate, explain, present on the stage, and listen actively to them. These interactions enrich and broaden you mind. People you meet here may even become your business partner or lifelong friends in the future. In all, the presence of other students and teachers help prepare a person for an office interactive environment.

Apart from learning new skills and interpersonal interaction, when applying for jobs, one can demonstrate their credibility easily by presenting a copy of graduation certificate. The employer will not need to worry that much about background check. It shortens the amount of time needed to screen candidates and gives a rough idea of your educational background. We would imagine one is exceptionally tech-savvy if presented with a degree certificate, say, from MIT.

Given the above reasons and examples, people attend colleges and universities to increase the chance of being hired, the career options to choose from, and a life of more variety, all thanks to the learning opportunities, networks and credibility provided by them.


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