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Urban areas contain a handful of noticeable problems whose main victims are juveniles


titi88 1 / -  
May 30, 2023   #1

Major cities in the world are growing fast, as well as their problems.


What are the problems that young people living in those cities are facing? Suggest some solutions.


In the modern era, the youngsters in capital cities have to deal with a majority of issues such as peer pressure as well as poor living conditions. From this author's perspective, these problems could be solved by verbal encouragement together with environmental campaigns.

Peer pressure is one of the most significant difficulties among adolescents. It is crystal clear that, as the education standard goes up, individuals find themselves surrounded by successful peers with numerous achievements along with respect from everybody. As a result, a phenomenon called peer pressure spreads widely to communities without distractions. This circumstance makes young people feel a lack of self-confidence, ambition and enthusiasm which are potential qualities needed to create a perfect stereotype.

Polluted environment needs to be considered in this debate. Since global warming is the hottest current affair, it is self-evident that major cities filled with industrial areas, skyscrapers and traffic jams during rush hours provide teenagers with a contaminated atmosphere to grow up in. During their childhood, urban citizens are likely to suffer from diseases, allergies or a bigger chance of getting cancer. Creating a tragic ending, this circumstance prevents children from further education, dream job or even a huge amount of money for health services.

In order to tackle this extraordinary affair, oral motivation with environmental schemes are required. In terms of offering motivative speech, operating meetings and talks with influencers who are spreading positive messages against negative thoughts is obviously meaningful to erase the pain, sorrow and depression brought to children's minds. Environmental arguments need to be made towards either government regulations for natural aspects or against illegal activities which are harmful for the earth.

Taking everything into account, urban areas contain a handful of noticeable problems whose main victims are juveniles like peer pressure and poisonous living space. It has also been pointed out that environmentalists and influencers must take action on giving inspiration along with fighting against destructive actions toward nature.
Holt  Educational Consultant - / 14,767 4772  
May 31, 2023   #2
It will be better if you do not reference any time frame in your prompt restatement since there was no time reference in the original prompt. All of these prompts are known to be happening in present time, unless otherwise specificed in the prompt. Since this is a first person opinion paper, avoid referencing yourself in third person. It is important that you take ownership of the provided opinion and continue to use first person references whenever possible throughout the essay. That way it is always clear tot he reader that youa re writing from personal experience and knowledge, which will earn you extra points from the examiner since those are expected to be the basis of your opinion anyway.

This is only a 4 paragraph essay. Your format should be:
Sentence 1 - Problem
Sentence 2 - Why is this a problem
Sentence 3 - Example of the problem
Sentence 4 - Solution suggestion
Sentence 5 - Solution explanation

While you will be given ample scores for this essay, it may still be seen as under developed in most instances since the solutions are not really well presented. You should fix that problem by simply using the format I am suggesting above.
chupchip 1 / 2 1  
Jun 1, 2023   #3
@titi88
Some expressions like "It is crystal clear that", "hottest affair" are quite informal and shouldn't be used in academic writing. Your solutions are quite shallow and too generic.

"Since global warming is the hottest current affair, it is self-evident that major cities filled with industrial areas, skyscrapers and traffic jams during rush hours provide teenagers with a contaminated atmosphere to grow up in." I don't see any connection between these 2 clauses, so you'd better omit the global warming part which is quite irrelevant.

"this circumstance prevents children from further education, dream job or even a huge amount of money for health services.". This is grammatically incorrect as you don't have a verb for this part. Should have added "create", "result in", etc.


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