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The use of social-sites can cause many physical and mental health problems and spread misinformation


Le hai 1 / -  
Jun 6, 2021   #1

the impact of facebook and other social sites on people



Some people claim that social media has a detrimental effect on both people and communities. I strongly support this notion. This essay will elaborate on the issue.

First of all, it is clear that over exposure to social media can lead to both physical and mental health problems. The excessive use of the Internet of many children can be responsible for the sedentary lifestyle. Nowadays, many young individuals spend hours lock themselves in the room and play video games all night without the parental control. Therefore, they tend to suffer from illness and poor-health problems. In addition, young social network users are also likely to experience cyber bullying which is the main cause of isolation and depression at the early age. For example, research has shown that more than 5 percent of high school students are the victim of cyber harassment.

Another reason for my belief is that the society is affected by the misleading news on the Internet. Due to the developing and widespread of social media, people can share news and posts that are not censored with ease. For instance, for the government in Vietnam, many reactionary often create a website that is similar to popular TV programs and upload fake news about politics and the communist party. Moreover, in modern days, when the covid-19 pandemic is spreading all over the world, fake news about medical treatments or the origin of the virus is widely spread, which can bring about the fear and panic for global citizens.

To sum up, it is true that the use of social-sites can cause many health problems physically and mentally for people and spread misleading information. For that reason, I believe that we should be more careful and take responsible for every time we use the social media.
Holt  Educational Consultant - / 10,933 3567  
Jun 7, 2021   #2
I strongly support this notion. This essay will elaborate on the issue.

Do not close the statement after your opinion. Offer your 2 discussion reasons to help offer the supporting reasons in a summary form. The reasons will help enlighten the examiner about the relevance of your supporting reasons to your opinion. It proves how well you understood the question in relation to TA considerations. You are scored on English comprehension skills in the first paragraph so work hard on providing a compelling restatement and thesis statement. Doing well in this section wins half the passing scoring marks you need to pass this text section.

both physical and mental health problems.

Divide this into 2 presentation paragraphs as these relate to 12 different health topics.

Therefore, they tend to suffer from illness and poor-health problems.

This is the central discussion topic. These needed to be fully developed in terms of explanation and examples. Instead, you are presenting a reason without supporting evidence. You cannot get a passing C+C score because your overall reasoning paragraphs suffer from this problem.

You clearly understand the writing demands of the instruction but fail to develop complete reasoning paragraphs due to your improper focus on reasoning statements rather than reasoning development/ explanation.


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