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Various ways of communication summary - all contribute to conveying information equally


wladca 1 / -  
Dec 12, 2016   #1
Hi,as I am preparing for my ielts test, i thought that it would be a good idea to post a thread here.The topic is as follows.Could you asses it in ielts bands as well. If yes , I would be very grateful for this.Thanks in advance.

Compare the advantages and disadvantages of three of the following as media for communicating information. State which you consider to be the most effective.

-comics
-books
-radio
-television
-film
-theatre

our constant need of communication was always the most prominent part of our cultures and ourselves.Due to this ,we have created a numer of ways to convey our thoughts,convictions or simply some basic information like weather .Some of them derive from the very beginning of our cilivisation like theatre or books.As many years passed, we invented television and radio.Now many of their advantages are under scrutiny, and some people even consider them as drawbacks, which are not up to date with the changing world.In the following essay, I am going to present some of the most prevalent ways of communication and describe their pros and cons.

Given books, they give a possibilty of getting knowledge from a numer of sources, not only popular ones that are common because of the fact that a lot of people buy it but also from scientific ones .Apart from this, that seems to be the most trusted way of conveying information;for instance,when it comes to the situation that proven data in needed, almost no one uses television as a trusted source.

On the other hand, books are not as handy as tablets or computers that can collect hundreds of volumes ,so much that no one could put into one's bag.

the Radio in turn is much more handy than books and can be turned on whenever we are ,and we don't need to focus our whole attention on this to understand the meaning of some audition. Despite this, radio is quite limited in terms of the numer of programmes to listen to, and it is sometimes very hard to find something that I am interested in.

Television is the most modern way of communication.It is often regarded as the most common one ,and similarly to the radio we can choose whatever we want .As for the similarities with books , we can pick up some of thousands of hundrends channals so that we may get any information we need.

Summing up, All of the given ways of communication contributed to conveying information equally, books in the past,radio in the most recent past and television is now reaching its peak of popularity;neverthless ,television is the most efficient one when we thing over the range of it and how many people use it in comparision to radio and books.
ichanpants89 [Contributor] 16 / 777 309  
Dec 12, 2016   #2
Is this a General Training IELTS prompt? If yes, this would be my first time in assessing this type of essay. I believe a GT IELTS still use public band descriptors for its assessment. Thus, the detailed feedback would be described below.

You need to know that in Grammatical range and accuracy criteria of assessment, punctuation is also assessed. Your punctuation mistakes are quite frequent. After period or comma, you have to give at a space before writing the next words/phrase. Try to focus on observing what I have written in this message. Capitalization is also essential, you can only capitalize or make your first letter of the word in capital form if it is the name of something or it is in the beginning of the sentence. After comma, you cannot make it in capital form again. Additionally, your spelling is also problematical. Proofreading several times is needed to avoid such problems. Due to the above-mentioned flaws, I reckon that in Grammatical range and accuracy part, this essay cannot go beyond 5.0.

Do not worry, there are still 3 other criteria of IELTS that can be taken into consideration. Those are Task Response/Achievement, Coherence and Cohesion, and Lexical Resource. Yet, if one of the criteria falls into 5, it is quite impossible to predict that the other scores might reach 7. The range would be between 4 minimum and 6 maximum.
Holt  Educational Consultant - / 14,767 4772  
Dec 13, 2016   #3
Ignacy, you neglected to represent what I consider to be the key point of the essay prompt. You failed to deliver a statement that represents the best method of communication via the pre-existing media choices. Without that reference to your personal opinion in the essay, your work is incomplete and doesn't totally deliver the task requirements as provided. Therefore, your task accuracy score will be no higher than a 4. The task accuracy, of the method by which you addressed the prompt requirements in totality represents a large part of your score. In fact, if you fail to score at least a 5 in this portion, getting higher scores in the remaining portions will be next to impossible.

That is because you have already shown a failure in terms of English comprehension skills. With faulty comprehension skills represented in the essay from the start of the paraphrased opening statement, there is absolutely no way you can get high ratings for the remaining scoring criteria of the essay.

While you state in the conclusion that the television is the best way to communicate, you are supposed to present that statement as your personal opinion. It is not part of the conclusion of the essay. Therefore, your task accuracy is tremendously faulty. A proper conclusion should have only summarized the discussion and your opinion at the end. It is not supposed to present your opinion as a final statement.


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