My view on Independent Recruiting of Universities

changes in chinese education

Elsewhere in the land of China's education,things move slowly but trouble is brewing：a spate of universities start recruiting students from senior high school on their own.Heated fights over this problem is about whether it is an appropriate moment for China's universities to start an independent recruiting.

Some people have a certain standing.They think such movement marks an important step.Now the universities can recruit elites from high school and give them a better education so that they could acquire more knowledge which is very important for their future career and life.But others believe such recruitment will not be straightforward.It will make the education in China become more inbalanced and the plight of inequality in education might worsen.And with such a tide,the abuse of power and authority in education would be growing.

Given the loot at stake, I think higher education and knowledge should go hand in hand.It's too early for those universities start independent recruiting.They need time to prove it whether it's worthwhile.Chine's educationis not perfect enough to embrace such change and it still needs to be amended.

@RayLi
Such kind of system ought to have its own kind of advantage and disadvantage, you only talked about the advantage, i think you must be able to i dentify both .

Rayli, you have an under developed opening statement. It seems like you are presenting the discussion to the reader from the middle of the discussion instead of at the very beginning. In order to better develop your essay, you have to first, state a proper thesis statement in the essay. What is the background of the recruiting discussion? Why has it become a heated topic? Why do you say "Elsewhere in China"? What was happening before this? Somehow, I feel like you have not provided me with the complete essay for consideration. There are too many missing elements in the first paragraph that make the second paragraph questionable. Please clarify those points before you proceed with any editing work on this essay. I want to be sure that you are going in the right direction.

@Holt
First of all ,I am very grateful to you for your advice. I'm a college student in China.I've been learning english for one years and the only reason i posted this writing is i hoped someone could check my writing and correct my grammar mistakes.I'm not good enough to write an essay.Your advice is very helpful.thank you .