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GRE-118: views we share vs views contradict our own and learning from it


buonarroti 1 / -  
Jun 8, 2014   #1
Please score and correct my essay. Thanks in advance!

#118 Issue: We can learn much more from people whose views we share than from people whose views contradict our own.

People whose opposite our opinion usually have grown up in terms of learning.
Also contradict opinion people evoke to our stress, but they make divers views of to our own.
According history, always Truth is translated by newly contrary thinking of which views contradict our own. In many field of human logos those views have influence each other for help people by overwhelming and uncover intelligence.

First in Middle Ages, many people believe Ptolemy theory. But Truth is geocentric theory and it is demonstrated by very minority people. They could not share their science opinion because religion's thought widely spread. This theory was proved later by Galileo and wrong view of world turn out as take a long time.

This issue tells to us that shared view of world is not close truth and can't really learn.

Second example, a family is composed divers people views although same blood relative. Most Primitive family Based relation of marriage that Woman and man have each other different background. Harmony of family drag exchanging of views out contrary situation of views contradict their own. It is a must to necessary progress for happiness and democratic learning progress in family. Most family members have some difference views as member's variety reason. So, to family have harmony views, member have some blending their experience and contrary each other.

Sometimes, these are good learning than share views.

Last old tradition or habitual behavior used to meet more reasonable views to help rational solution. We learned many things from person whose views we share but also easily lean wrong things. Consequently these shared leaning may be couldn't arrive more effective or voluntary learning. Effective decision need contradict views and new knowledge from integrated persons whom through many divers experience. These progress or rational solution same equal arouse from integrated contrary views and shared views.

To sum up, viewpoints of contrary are necessary to progress rational leaning and harmony member. So if we need to deeply learning, we consider the contrary views and overcome these differ views than shared with same views.
dumi 1 / 6,925 1592  
Jul 18, 2014   #2
Why are you having three parts for the introduction. You should have had all these sentences in on para and present it as your introductory para.

People whose oppositewho oppose our opinions usually have grown up in terms of learning.
I do not understand the second part of this sentence :(


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