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IELTS writing task 2. Visitors should follow local behavior or not ?


Mowonight 9 / 19 3  
Mar 19, 2014   #1
TASK 2 :

Some people believe that visitors to other countries should follow local customs and behavior. Others disagree and think that the host country should welcome cultural differences.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Nowdays, travelling is becoming much easier. Beside, countries have to satisfy this hudge wave of travellers, from different horizons. People wants a comfortable journey in the one hand, but also an exotic travel in the other hand. For me, the most important is to provide visitors a hudge change during their small time of holidays, who wants to leave their routine, but providing some services for long period visitors.

The main reason of travelling for some people is discovering a new culture, whereas for some others it is more the exotism. In these both cases, local customs and behavior are welcome to enhance the power of exotism and the feeling of being free of it's own culture. For example, going to Japan was for me an inforgivable experience. I was far away my own country behavior, but rocked by the local people and traditions. That also enhanced my mind and values.

However, providing visitors the confort of staying close to their usual habits could be reassuring in some cases. Every country should provide everyone's demand. Where some people will prefer to eat the local food, others will prefer not to change their alimentary's habits. More important is satisfy long-period visitors. Exhanges students or expatriates who are far away their families and country need sometimes to be close of their roots. Everything depend of how long you stay in the host country.

In conclusion, countries should think about the majority of visitors who look after exotism. But also provide services for the other visitors, who settle down for a mid or long term. More sedentary, they require a certain need of confort, like being close of their own culture.

SHanafi 120 / 415 93  
Mar 19, 2014   #2
Nowdays

Nowadays

Beside

Besides

inforgivable

please kindly re-check in your dictionary that this is an appropriate word
OP Mowonight 9 / 19 3  
Mar 19, 2014   #3
Thank you SHanafi, my essay is actually full of mistakes. I don't know what happened today but for sure my spelling checker didn't work. :-/

I attached here the graphs.

edit : well since I couldn't attached it, it's this one : essay forum / writing-feedback-3/task-usa-marriage-divorce-rates-51871/
SHanafi 120 / 415 93  
Mar 19, 2014   #4
Hi, Theo
I am studying IELTS also. as I am not a native, my writing is still far from mature. Maybe it's kind a bored activity, I hope you are willing to opened your dictionary repetitively to cope with spelling error.

Hopefully help you, cheers :D
Pahan 1 / 1,906 553  
Mar 19, 2014   #5
People wants a comfortable journey in the one hand, but also an exotic travel in the other hand.

PEOPLE is a plural word meaning a collection of men/women. So, it should be "people want"
man wants/ men want/ people want

Well, this introduction fails to introduce your topic theme. That is the main objective of the introduction. I strongly recommend you to follow dumi's suggestion for intro.
dumi 1 / 6,928 1592  
Mar 20, 2014   #6
You should not have two essays in one thread. Open a fresh thread to post the IELTS Task 1 essay which I removed form this thread.

The main reason of travelling for some people is discovering a new culture, whereas for some others it is more the exotism.

well, what do you mean by this second part ? I guess the word you were trying to use is exoticism. However, your idea is not clearly conveyed letting the reader be confused.

This sentence needs improvement in its presentation;
First, one of the main objectives of travelling is to discover new cultures.
OP Mowonight 9 / 19 3  
Mar 21, 2014   #7
Thank you dumi. You are right, I need to improve my clarity, since the examiner is not a thought-reader...

I will work on it.

2. Background - Give the context to the reader

Y, I always screw this part, I will concentrate on it.

Thanks again for your feedbacks !


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