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Watching television together makes communication among friends and family stronger


gbekil 7 / 17 2  
Oct 3, 2014   #1
Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?Television has destroyed communication among friens and family. Use specific reasons and examples to support your opinion.

Having watched televison , which supplies a funny and instructive time with friends and family , I have mostly ceratainly experienced many of the advantages of television. As a direct consequence of these observations , I firmly believe it absolutely imperative that a person learn a lot from television. Of the numerous positive aspects of this, perhaps the most attractive ones are having a lot of funny time, learning new places on the world, and gathering from television about cooking new meals.

The first substantial benefit of watching television with your fiends is having funny time while watching your favorite movie which makes your time enjoyable , not destroyes your communication among friends. How I meet your mother, for example, is the funniest movie which is watched by a myriad of people. As a matter fo fact, my best friend and I really like "How I meet your mother". While we are watching this movie , we get a lot of fun, after the movie we find a lot of things to talk.

Not only is having fun a major advantage, but also learning about new places on the world is a crucial attraction due to fact that there is a myriad of places which a person can not see all of them. As an illustration, Travel&Again Travel, is a television program which a girl visit a multitude of cities , and explain about them. Indeed, my father and I love this programme. We always watch it together, and we always talk about that one day we may go and visit these places.

In addition to having enjoyable time, and learning about new places on the world, gathering from television about cooking meals is a final compelling benefit, since there is a lot of meals which a person never knowns about it. To exemplify, "Let's Cook Together", which is a program a man both cooks a variety of meals ,and talk about their history. In fact, this program is my mother's and my favorite program which we watch it together. After learning a meal that looks so delicious, we sometimes try to cook it, and have great time with my mum.

In summary, after elabrating extensively on the positive preeminent attributes of watcing television, including having funny time, learning new places on the world, and gathering from television about cooking new meals, I feel it is almost irrefutable that this is a considerably more expedient choice. As a matter of fact, it crucially vital that individulas maximize these impressive benefits; otherwise, they may never fullfill their goals of having a satisfying and constructive personal life. Actulally, even though some still advocate watching television destroyed communication among friends and family, the vast majority fully comprehends the trully altractions of watching television makes communication among friends and family stronger.

peyman_np 6 / 15 1  
Oct 3, 2014   #2
Friend in the prompt is written wrong!
Mostly certainly in the first sentence of first paragraph is not very good. Does not make good feeling.
I firmly believe it absolutely imperative that = same meaning , no verb for the second part
aps the most attractive ones are = one
The first substantial benefit of watching television with your fiends is having funny time while watching your favorite movie which makes your time enjoyable , not destroyes your communication among friends=long and complicated sentences, not good! try to be more comfortable, be aware that the rater does not have a lot of time to grasp every point of your essay, you should write in the easiest and simultaneously, complicated way.

overally, it is a fairly good essay. Try to develop your essay more.
OP gbekil 7 / 17 2  
Oct 3, 2014   #3
Thanks your for admonitions @peyman_np; I will improve my writings...
Vns9x 102 / 236 16  
Oct 3, 2014   #4
There are some typos problems such ceratainly it is absolutely. Elementally, just type little slower i know that ideas were racing in your head;D
ritairianti 3 / 12 4  
Oct 5, 2014   #5
i will give you some patern :
1. introduction
you should paraphrasing this issue, and write clearly with two sentences . why two sententence? because it makes examiner read clearly about the issue and your position (your agree / disagree) .

2. paragraph two
it is about your opinion, why you are agree/disagree ? and your reasons and example also.
3. paragraph three
it is about your opinion, why you are agree/disagree ? and your reasons and example also.
4. conclusion
summarize your opinion from paragraph two and three .

it is better if you write agree statement on paragraph two and write disagree statement on paragraph three.
then, summarize both of them in conclusion.

paragraph one
Having watched televison , which supplies a funny and instructive time with friends and family... ,
you dont write verb in this sentence .

and please gives attention about your spelling .

cheers~


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