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IELTS-Wealthy nations have an obligation to provide food and education to the poorer?


AntonR 1 / -  
Apr 11, 2013   #1
Should wealthy nations be required to share their wealth among poorer nations by providing such things as food and education?

There is a huge gap between economies of wealthy and poorer nations in the world
It is a debatable topic that rich nations should provide aid for the poorer nations, especially in the areas of food and education. How poor country should deal with brain drain? Those questions are often seen in main newspapers and TV shows, people have opposite points of view. My personal opinion is that wealthy countries should help poor countries.

Furthermore, wealthy countries don't need to give money and food, Instead they can share education and technologies that are necessary to build sustainable society. Another case is when one or several countries face famine, war, or natural disaster (for example earthquake in Hawaii, tsunami in Thailand).

However, personally I believe that giving money and resources to poor countries is not an option, because recipient countries will be dependent on rich countries at the end. They should develop sustainable economy and stable society parallel with their own culture.

I am originally from Belarus. My country has the same problem like a lot of others countries which is called brain drain. Belarus is surrounded by more wealthy countries and EU. Unfortunately we are not very rich country, but we have very good education system and it just works, but our economy doesn't. Most of all my friends have university degree and they live in others countries.

For conclusion I want to add that this question is more complicated than it looks like, and now I have more questions than answers. I still truly believe that everlasting wealth sharing is not acceptable.

Misius 4 / 12 3  
Apr 13, 2013   #2
this topic has to be discussed

Those questions are often seen

people havea lot of opposite points of view

should help to poor countries

technologies that are necessary

Another case is when one

and what is the case? you need to develop your idea

However, give money and recources to the poor country I think it is a really bad idea

However, personally I believe that giving money and resources to poor countries is not an option

be dependent on rich

their own

which is called brain drain

Belarus is surrounded

question is more complicated than it looks like

You have rich vocabulary and now you need to focus on grammar. I've corrected only some serious grammar mistakes but there should also be some improvements in the style because some sentences still sound "russian". Keep going this way and everything will be ok!
dumi 1 / 6,928 1592  
Apr 13, 2013   #3
There is a big economy gap between wealthy countries and poor countries in our world.

There is a huge gap between economies of wealthy and poorer nations in the world.

It is a hot topic and this topic havehas to be discussed.

.... this sentence doesn't come nicely. You need to specifically say what this topic is! My suggestion;
It is a debatable topic that rich nations should provide aid for the poorer nations, especially in the ares of food and education.

My personal opinion is that wealthy countries should help to poor countries.

.... you need to take this line to the introduction where you introduce your topic to the reader and then state your opinion. In the body paragraphs you need to provide reasons (one reason per para is enough) for holding that opinion and then support those reasons with specific examples.
dumi 1 / 6,928 1592  
Apr 13, 2013   #4
There is a huge gap between economies of wealthy and poorer nations in the world..

This should be your introductory paragraph. Don't leave the first line separate.

Furthermore, wealthy countries don't need to give money and food, Instead they can share education and technologies that are necessary to build sustainable society.

Well ... why you exclude food? Your prompt includes food ! Always go with the prompt and align your writing with that. The argument here is whether wealthy nations should support poorer nations or not. Since you believe that they wealthy guys should support, give reasons as to why they should do it. For example, you can say that preserving humanity in the world is a prime responsibility of wealthy nations. Or else you can say, the rich nations need to be responsible for the acts they did in the past that caused these differences.


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