Hello! This is my first draft for my Why NYU essay. Its's a work in progress. Please let me know your thoughts and opinions. Thank you!
A Whole New Galaxy
I looked up to see a stunning sight staring back at me, the purple stars shining brighter than usual. As a little girl, I'd always admire the galaxy and now after years of longing and yearning to be there, I finally had a chance to be a part of the galaxy; NYUAD
Its various planets teaching different aspects drew me into the program. The galaxy was vast, spanning over thousands of kilometers yet its scattered stars stayed connected building connections and patterns forming a globular cluster similar to a paradise with a global network. NYUAD' s galaxy located in-universe Abu Dhabi, a melting pot of cultures and diverse social groups. I found it to be celestial, how this galaxy can magically bring everyone together forming a diverse community under one universe. In this one location, everything that I aspire to be, learn and achieve is all made possible through its planets and stars
Galaxy NYUAD shie brighter than the rest with its galactic options allowing me to pursue Literature and Creative Writing major under Philip Kennedy and yet at the same time pursue a minor in Design headed by Goffredo Puccetti.
it'll shape me into a universal leader, one successful anywhere and comfortable everywhere. As the purple sheen envelopes me, I know I'll be able to use its resources and do things essential to me such as starting an environment club and encouraging a sustainable lifestyle, through its plants, cosmic facilities, and gleaming resources. I'm excited to start my classes in a galaxy with diverse stars ready to hear my voice and planets ready to guide me to the supernova I aspire to be.lol I'm also applying to NYU this year. The metaphor is perfect but I think it takes too much space of your essay. Your essay should focus more on NYUAD, not elegant words. Personally, I would recommend you to link NYUAD to your past experience or projects and discuss how its sources can help you specifically,
