Unanswered [0] / Urgent [0] / SERVICES
 DrAfT!
Home / Writing Feedback   8

"wisdom" that old people have - Knowledge gained from books or from experience?


I have prepare the toefl exam and I feel that the writing it is the most difficult part for me.

Can anybody give me a feedback of this essay? Thank you so much!!

It has been said, "Not everything that is learned is contained in books." Cmpare and constract knowledge gained from experience with knowledge gained from books. In your opinion, which source is more important? Why?

I think that knowledge gained from experience it is more important that the one gained from books.

In my opinion the most important thing is that the knowledge gained from experience it is an embodied one, you live the situation and you know exactly how does it feels. This is crucial because it is not a cognitive knowledge it is one actualized with the reality. The result is that when a similar situation happens you most know what to do and the consequence of your reactions or behaviour. The best example it is when a child get burned, if it hurts surely he will never touch the fire again because he knows by he experience what happens and the association will be done automatically in his mind and body.

This can be translated to every situation in every day life and also for understanding deeply the meaning of some abstract concepts like love, fear, faith or happiness. When we talk about practical things in every day life we mean for example you really learn how to cook when you begin doing it and when we talk about concepts for example you know what it is love when you have the experience of loving some one. You can read it in a book but feeling it will give you the real meaning of the word.

One of the best ways of learning things it is when you travel. This is the better example that knowledge gained from experience it is a very important source. For example going to the Coliseum or to Pyramids will give you the sense of how they lived in that period.

So the knowledge or maybe another proper world might be "wisdom" that old people have it is related with all the situations that had lived through their lives and where they had learned much more than in books.

Don't repeat "it is", "it" "those" "that"...be specific, give specific noun, or it is confused

Use simple sentences or short sentences if you are not sure how to write it
Take a look at this sentence " When we talk about practical things in every day life we mean for example you really learn how to cook when you begin doing it and when we talk about concepts for example you know what it is love when you have the experience of loving some one."<=This is too long, let's break it "when we talk about practical things in everyday life, we mean...(x?). For example, or ";for example, you really only learn how to cook when you are in the procedure. In the same hand, you really don't know what love is until you are in love.

=>I think that knowledge gained from experience is more important than knowledge (those) gained from books.

=>In my opinion, knowledge gained from experience is an embodied one
... it is not a cognitive knowledge it is one actualized with the reality.<=what is this, need to rewrite
=>The result is that when a similar situation happens you most know what to do and the consequence of your reactions or behaviour. (replace "result" with something elso, it's confused)

=>The best example it is when a child get burned, if it hurts surely he will never touch the fire again because he knows by he experience what happens and the association will be done automatically in his mind and body.=>For example, when a child (infant, toddler...) get burned by an accident, he will learn not touching the fire

This can be translated to every situation in every day life and also for understanding deeply the meaning of some abstract concepts like love, fear, faith or happiness. => Don't use "this", use "learning from experience" if you mean it, or you lose the reader

One of the best ways of learning things it is when you travel. (do not give 2 subjects; you have "learning" don't use "it")=> One of the best ways of leaning things is when you travel; even stronger=> The best way of learning is traveling

One of the best ways of learning things it is when you travel. This is the better example that knowledge gained from experience it is a very important source. For example going to the Coliseum or to Pyramids will give you the sense of how they lived in that period.=> you have a good point from this para, so you just prove it.
The real world knowledge can be gained in two ways by learning from books and also from personal experiences. In my opinion both the knowledge gained from books and the knowledge earned by real world experience have their own significances in different instances of life. We go to school, college and universities to learn from books, without that we will become illiterate and ignorant. Books are the great source of information based on the experiences of the others. Since we cannot experience everything in this world, there are plenty of things for which we have to rely on books only. But this is also a known fact that we cannot learn all the things from books. To further our knowledge we require both lessons learnt from books as well as from the experiences.

We require the information given in the books to attain a certain level to face the real world situations and only after experiencing that situation we can say that now we have a complete knowledge of this subject. Like I am a dental surgeon, so the universities make us read books in the initial periods of our academics and only after gaining the knowledge from texts we are allowed to work on real patients that basically happen in the final year of the graduation. But the most important and most difficult lessons are learned only after we land up in those situations. What books teach us is all theoretical and can be applied only in the most ideal situations and ideal situations are the rarest things occurring in a day to day life. The virtue of experience makes us an adept.

In addition to this, I strongly believe that the most important lessons in life are learnt through experience only, like the feeling of love, affection, sacrifice etc. is the things that we won't understand until and unless we experience them. We have to learn by experience to what is required to get along with the people or to gain self respect in the society. All these things are learned not by reading books but by experiencing. Therefore, I feel that both the means of information have their own importance in different aspects of life and we should learn from both.
Yes Susan I am already a surgeon...Thank for all the help you are giving me...and I am sorry and now I always start a new thread. I have my exam afterone week.. can you please help me a little more on my essays.


Home / Writing Feedback / "wisdom" that old people have - Knowledge gained from books or from experience?