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"Wise people appreciate the little things in life" - narrative essay


bal0601 1 / 2  
Aug 11, 2009   #1
Here is my narrative essay topic. Could you please let me know how I correct usage, structrue and conventions, support and development of this essay?

Wise people appreciate the little things in life. How did you learn that you should appreciate the little things around you?

"Always appreciate even small things" was the phrase that I repeated to myself everyday. But in reality, I took the small things for granted and always tried to have something more or better or different than what I already had. Then right after I had a baby, I gradually started to look at life from a very different perspective.

I love babies and children so much. Therefore, I hoped that I have a baby right after marriage. However, I had suffered to get pregnant for five years after marriage. During this time, it was hard for me to even look at other women holding a baby on the streets. When I finally got pregnant after five years of tries, I and my husband were so happy. However, that happiness did not last very long because I had a miscarriage after two months. I was filled with grief so that I was not able to eat anything for a few days. It took a couple of more years to get pregnant again but soon I was at risk of a miscarriage and was hospitalized.

Before being pregnant, I wished a lot of things for a baby to come; pretty appearance with long legs, and big eyes, and being smart. I took those things for granted. However, after having difficulty to be pregnant and experiencing the miscarriage, I realized how much I should be thankful that my baby would be born just healthy. In hospital, I prayed that I could give up everything, for giving birth to a healthy baby. After several months in hospital, I finally was delivered of a baby boy. I could not help shedding tears of gratitude.

Thanks to my baby, every moment that life offers is treated as special, then I started to appreciate it and give thanks for it a lot more. I feel happy when he smiles or even cries. I appreciate when he eats well. I am thankful for sunny days which my baby can play outside. Although his physical and cognitive development has not been faster than other babies, I have felt just happy and thankful because he has not been sick and hurt.

I sometimes feel that nursing a baby is not easy one because I am forced to sacrifice myself in many aspects. However, I always remind myself of the time that I had difficulty to have a baby, then I realize I should appreciate everything in my life.
EF_Simone 2 / 1,986  
Aug 11, 2009   #2
I wonder if you can add more feeling to this? If you let the reader see your struggles to conceive and your grief after the miscarriage, then the reader will be better able to celebrate with you when the baby is born.
OP bal0601 1 / 2  
Aug 11, 2009   #3
Simone
Thank you so much!
I'll try to add more feeling.
By the way, I wonder whether my essay fits the topic, if I do so?
EF_Simone 2 / 1,986  
Aug 12, 2009   #4
Yes, your essay will continue to fit the topic if you add more feeling.
OP bal0601 1 / 2  
Aug 20, 2009   #5
Hi,
I add some feeling here. please proofreading for my essay. Thank you!:)


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