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Women presence in the every sector of human life


FirmanRomadhon20 9 / 15  
Sep 21, 2016   #1
TED Video Summary: Sheryl Sandberg: Why We Have Too Few Women Leaders.

This video is topic what explains about women action in the every sector of human life. The speaker on the video is a success woman who have gotten top position in her job, Sheryl Sandberg. She told that in this present time, women were stiil not able to get top position in their career. This was really occured with some facts which could support that explaining condition. She made example about the official of government, especially head of state from some countries in the world that from 190 county, there were just 9 person whose to be head of states. It happened too for private sector which just 20 percent women can get top position in some industries.

Therefore, She said that women in the next time have to be better rather than in her life era, for getting top position in every life sector. She argued that there were tree way to get success as a woman in the career. Those were sit at the table, make your partner in your real partner, and do not leave before you leave. All of these ways, the important thing was making a partner as a real partner. Because women had to find their man who supported them to get success in the career. Beside of that, the other thing was keep in the side of the decision which had been decided. All in all, Sheryl said that if many women wanted to get succes for their life. the first thing, they had to be able to decide their choice, and believe that woman can do the same thing with what was done by men.

fadhilmd25 41 / 75 11  
Sep 21, 2016   #2
Dear FirmanRomadhon, here are some advices for your writing, feel free to correct me,

This video is topic what -->

The topic of the video is about

The speaker on the video is a success woman -->

The speaker is a successful woman

who have gotten top position in her job --> change have to "Has"

She made example about -->

She made an example about

head of state from some countries in ... -->

head of states of several countries in the world

Therefore, She said that women in the next time ... -->

Therefore, She said that women in the future need to be better rather than in her life era

Hope it helps you to improve your writing skill,

regards


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