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To work and learn at the same time. Advantages and disadvantages.


Cherry88 1 / 1  
May 5, 2012   #1
Hi all! can you check my essay and correct it?
It is very important to work and learn at the same time nowodays. A lot of students put this into practise. Some of them work just for their university fees, on the contrary, the other work just for enlarging their experiences. However, it is important to say that, all of them find advantages and disadvantages of this.

Firstly, the advantages of working and learning at the same time are the abilities that you can earn money yourself and this way to help your parents. Moreover, it is great to use your free time from learning to working. Take for instance, my brother works and studies at the same time, and the main point is that, he will be well experienced to the end of his education. In a nutshell, it is like two in one. In addition, he likes doing this because he can use the information that he gets at his university in his work. This practise is a good way to fix his knowledges.

Secondly, there are a lot of disadvantages too. For example, students are tired after school or university and work. It is hard to do homeworks after such a difficult day. That is to say, it is not so easy to get an information you are given without diong homeworks properly. Furthemore, you have not so much free time to meet with your friends and relatives.

Finally, as I mentioned previously, The advantages and disadvantages of this issue are endless. In my opinion, working and learning at the same time is excellent but, every student has to assess his own abilities and power. If the student overload himself it can bring him to a bad accomplishment.

westway50 1 / 8  
May 6, 2012   #2
A lot of students put this into practice

your last few sentences in the first paragraph is a bit confusing. i would try rewording it into something like "some students work to pay off university fees while others work for the job experience. It is important to note that whatever the reason, there are advantages and disadvantages to working while in school"

I would change "firstly" in your second paragraph to something else. also help your parents with what?(we know it means with financially, but include it so it doesn't leave us thinking too much)

"Moreover, it is great to use your free time from learning to working". the sentence could be worked on to flow better.

"Take for instance, my brother works and studies at the same time, and the main point is that, he will be well experienced to the end of his education". try to make this two sentences and mention what kind of work he does and what kind of experience he will be "well experienced" in.

"In a nutshell, it is like two in one". two in one of what?

"In addition, he likes doing this because he can use the information that he gets at his university in his work. This practice is a good way to fix his knowledge ."

"Second , there are a lot of disadvantages too". good to list some of them here.
"For example, students are tired after school or university and work. It is hard to do homeworks after such a difficult day. That is to say, it is not so easy to get an information you are given without diong homeworks properly. Furthemore, you have not so much free time to meet with your friends and relatives". try making your sentences here more to the point

Finally, as I mentioned previously, The advantages and disadvantages of this issue are endless. where did you mention this before?

In my opinion, working and learning at the same time is excellent, but every student has to assess his own abilities and powerto do what?. If the student overloads himself it can result in poor performance.

hopes this helps a bit.
OP Cherry88 1 / 1  
May 7, 2012   #3
thank you very much, i will try not to do such a mistakes anymore :)


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