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Write a short story. Imagine you wake up in a completely different city



Chuyen97 2 / 1  
Feb 1, 2025   #1
Imagine you wake up in a completely different city, with no idea how you got there. Write about your experience as you try to find your way back home. What challenges do you face? How do you feel?

I suddenly woke up in a penthouse. Light crept into the room, making me instinctively draw the curtains to see what was happening outside. Incredibly, a vivid and vibrant cityscape unfolded in front of my eyes. Skyscrapers dominated the skyline, their glass facades reflecting the hustle and bustle lifestyle. The streets teemed with people, creating an atmosphere of energy and movement.
A wave of emotions rushed through me-excitement mixed with overwhelming confusion. A thousand questions flooded my mind. How did I get here? Where exactly was I? As always, whenever I encountered challenges, I took a deep breath and thought carefully about my next steps. Looking around the room, I found only my luggage and my phone-no sign of anyone else. Immediately, I used my phone to check my location and contacted my sister for advice on the best way to get home. What a relief! She guided me on the best way to return home.
Nevertheless, I was aware that some opportunities never come again, so I decided to explore the city while waiting for the flight home. Without deadlines or rush, I hopped on a bus, taking in the stunning view. Billboards hung on towering glass buildings, yellow taxis and cyclists filled the roads, while street performers and vendors added to the lively atmosphere. Getting off the bus, I wandered into a cozy coffee shop. The warm aroma of freshly brewed coffee enveloped me, instantly soothing my nerves. Sipping my coffee and enjoying a piece of cake gave me a sense of relaxation. Surrounding me were people from diverse cultural backgrounds, making it clear that this was a true metropolitan city.
Although I didn't clearly understand what was happening around me, I found myself enjoying the fast-paced environment and global atmosphere. My initial fear gradually faded, making room for excitement and appreciation.
Luckily, I arrived home safely and reunited with my family. After reflecting on my journey, I realized it had been a wonderful experience. The only regret I had was not being able to interact deeply with the local residents. Nevertheless, this became my motivation to enhance my language skills and pursue my goal of becoming a polyglot one day.

Holt  Educational Consultant - / 15539  
Feb 2, 2025   #2
The story you wrote is inconsistent in presentation style. You started off with the feel of a suspense thriller. Including elements of doubt, a scene of potential disaster, questions that deserved to be answered in the telling of the story (but wasn't). The sense of drama dropped from high to a sudden low. It was almost like you changed your mind about trying to write a mystery thriller, putting on the breaks and then suddenly changing to a general patronage story. That is why the writing writing is inconsistent and the emotions presented felt choppy. Simplify the beginning. Use a simpler opening for your setting. Say you woke up in a bed and breakfast or something but you did not recall how you got there. Explain how you got there later on by indicating you found a taxi receipt or a bus ticket. Attribute your memory loss to say, jetlag or something. Look for holes in your short story and make sure to plug / respond to them throughout the presentation.
OP Chuyen97 2 / 1  
Feb 2, 2025   #3
@Holt I appreciate your detailed feedback and will apply your practical advice to make the story more engaging. I would love to hear your thoughts on the grammar and structure I used in the short story. "I aim to improve my English skills rather than my storytelling abilities. My main goal is to enhance my English proficiency.


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