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IELTS WRITNG TASK 1: The process of producing coffee and preparing for sale

Red Moon 14 / 33 6  
Aug 6, 2018   #1

11 steps of coffee manufacturing

The diagram below shows how coffee is produced and prepared for sale in supermarkets and shops.

The picture illustrates the process of coffee production and preparation for selling in supermarkets and shops.

Overall, producing coffee involves 11 steps before it can be put on the market. The process starts with collecting the coffee beans and culminates with filling up jars with coffee.

To begin with, the coffee beans are harvested on the farm and dried in the sun to remove water. After that, the beans are roasted and cooled quickly. Then, they are converted into powder by being ground a grinding machine and mix with hot water to become a mixture, which is strained in the next step.

At the next stage, the strained mixture becomes frozen liquid at a low temperature. Subsequently, it passes through a grinder the second time, which is followed by being dried in a vacuum so that the water turns into moisture. Finally, the coffee powder is packed into jars and it is ready to be delivered to shops.

Minh2903 6 / 14 3  
Aug 7, 2018   #2
Here a some of my suggestion that I hope that it could help with your writing:

collecting the coffee beans (first-time mention)
Next, the frozen liquid is collected and placed in a vacuum to be dehydrated, making sure they are completely waterless.

Overall, I think this it is well-written.
Hope it would help.
Holt [Contributor] - / 7,610 1956  
Aug 7, 2018   #3
Moon, you can present a cleaner, concise, and thorough opening summary if you do not separate your statements into stand alone sentences. When you place all the separate sentences together in one paragraph of 3 sentences, you present a clear overview summary with a clear outline for the upcoming discussion presentation. Now, you will probably say, "Then I would only have 3 paragraphs". That's true. That is because you did not follow the illustration separation of steps as it was shown to you. In truth, the illustrations are presented in 4 stages composed of 11 steps.

Therefore, each 3 drawing descriptions is equivalent to 1 paragraph. So, 4 levels of illustration is equal to 4 sets of paragraphs. That is a little trick that helps you to achieve the proper word and paragraph count for the essay. For procedural description essays, which this is, count the number of steps, then count the lines of drawings to figure out how many paragraphs can be presented. It will never be less than 4 paragraphs.

By the way in the last step, where you mention that the ground coffee is vacuum dried to turn into moisture, actually, vacuum drying the ground beans removes moisture. All of coffee in the supermarkets are vacuum packed with the moisture removed in order to preserve the coffee. You either misunderstood the diagram or you do not understand how coffee is really made and what vacuum packing means. vacuum packing means removing moisture to create a longer shelf life, which is what is done to make sure the coffee will remain fresh for a long time on the store shelves.

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