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Posts by JusRandom
Name: Ervin Binu Joseph
Joined: Dec 13, 2018
Last Post: Dec 21, 2018
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JusRandom   
Dec 20, 2018
Writing Feedback / The range of technology currently available is increasing the gap between rich and poor. Is it true? [4]

I was hoping someone could help me improve my writing for the IELTS. Please help me out with some suggestions

ESSAY FOR IELTS: TECHNOLOGY



Some people think that the range of technology currently available is increasing the gap between rich and poor. Others think it is the opposite effect.

Discuss both views and give your opinion.

As time progresses, technology is becoming more integrated into the lifestyle of a common man because of its implications. But this begs the question: Is the wide variety of electronic devices available to us creating an economic disparity in our society? This essay refers to two main pointers. Firstly, how technology is making it easy to access information and secondly, how automation is affecting people of lower stature.

Since its advent, technology has become more accessible by a large majority of the human population making the attainment of information easier than ever before. For a lot of individuals, this has created opportunities to think outside of the box or helped them find their own niche in our urban society, creating a positive feedback loop which in turn helps us reach greater heights of development. This evolution has further helped us attain better living conditions and better economic conditions.

Despite the positive impacts of technology, automation has served to be a boon for people of the worse end of the economic spectrum. As technology advances, many of the unskilled work done by laborers have been automated. This, in turn, destroys the livelihood of such people making it difficult for them to attain money, creating a gap between them and the well-off.

Finally, when we look at technology's impact from an overall perspective, it is clear that it has resulted in equalizing the economic conditions of the people rather than creating a disparity of wealth as it has opened a vast variety of opportunities for people to attain a better earning and lifestyle.
JusRandom   
Dec 21, 2018
Writing Feedback / The range of technology currently available is increasing the gap between rich and poor. Is it true? [4]

Could I be able to change the structure of the existing and then make it relevant to the topic? Because my prime intention was to show the reader that access to information will curb the growth of the economic disparity but in other cases when to let say, a business owner is able to substitute his laborers with machines that do they work creating an economic disparity.

Other than that. Thank you for your response and support. :)
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