Chroma
Nov 28, 2021
Undergraduate / Balance - UBC Tell us about who you are. [3]
I'm applying to UBC and this is what I've written for the first question as of the moment. I'm not sure about the opening of the essay as well as the tone, so I was hoping I could get some help here.
Prompt:
How would your family, friends and/or members of your community describe you? If possible, please include something about yourself that you are most proud of and why. (1500 Characters)
Hello, my name is Allan Hu. Some of my titles would be the youngest sibling of a family of four, a second-generation Chinese immigrant, a student at Western Canada High School, a programmer, or a gamer. Those do describe me, but who really am I?
My family would tell you that I'm mild-mannered but strong in my beliefs, someone who does work when it's needed and helps when he can. My classmates at high school would tell you that I'm funny and amiable, but that I get serious when it comes to school work and am very studious. At the place that I volunteered as a junior ski instructor at during the winter, Calgary Olympic Park, the staff would tell you that I am a bright, driven volunteer who doesn't slack off. That, while I followed instructions as well as I could, I always looked for opportunities to apply myself. Actually, a staff member once told me that "[I was] the best volunteer [they'd] ever had." That... was very flattering. People that I work together with on group projects or during Hackathons might tell you that I was a leader; organizing and directing and always working with them to get the best out of them.
If you ask me, I'm a balance of all of those things. Knowing when to lead and when to follow, how to work hard and how to take breaks, focusing on intellect or emotion; all of these traits have two sides of them that need to be balanced. I feel that I have achieved a good balance in these traits and that is something I am most proud of.
I'm applying to UBC and this is what I've written for the first question as of the moment. I'm not sure about the opening of the essay as well as the tone, so I was hoping I could get some help here.
Prompt:
Tell us about who you are.
How would your family, friends and/or members of your community describe you? If possible, please include something about yourself that you are most proud of and why. (1500 Characters)
Hello, my name is Allan Hu. Some of my titles would be the youngest sibling of a family of four, a second-generation Chinese immigrant, a student at Western Canada High School, a programmer, or a gamer. Those do describe me, but who really am I?
My family would tell you that I'm mild-mannered but strong in my beliefs, someone who does work when it's needed and helps when he can. My classmates at high school would tell you that I'm funny and amiable, but that I get serious when it comes to school work and am very studious. At the place that I volunteered as a junior ski instructor at during the winter, Calgary Olympic Park, the staff would tell you that I am a bright, driven volunteer who doesn't slack off. That, while I followed instructions as well as I could, I always looked for opportunities to apply myself. Actually, a staff member once told me that "[I was] the best volunteer [they'd] ever had." That... was very flattering. People that I work together with on group projects or during Hackathons might tell you that I was a leader; organizing and directing and always working with them to get the best out of them.
If you ask me, I'm a balance of all of those things. Knowing when to lead and when to follow, how to work hard and how to take breaks, focusing on intellect or emotion; all of these traits have two sides of them that need to be balanced. I feel that I have achieved a good balance in these traits and that is something I am most proud of.