Undergraduate / Reflect on a challenge you overcame through persistence (two ideas, one to pick) [6]

Thank you so much for the help! Sorry i forgot to state that this essay is actually for my high school senior questionnaire to help the teachers write a recommendation.

If you can, please read the essay below and let me know what you think.
Thank you.

"I find 10,000 ways something won't work, I haven't failed. I am not discouraged because every wrong attempt discarded is another step forward." Said Thomas Edison. It reminds me of my Chemistry class last year, learning about the scientific method. I learned whenever we make an experiment we can only prove something if only one independent variable is altered at a time. Even if the test didn't work as we planned we still look for other variables to solve for until we're left with the right answer. That could take 2 , 3, 10 or even 10,000 tries, as Thomas Edison stated, to finally pay off. All those tries seeming to be a failure are an opportunity to gain success through experience and persistence.

It all started with a dream, an aspiration and a need to change that my mom had for me and my brother. Coming to the US was a whole new experience for me from the climate change to the way of life. It is not a surprise that all English second language learners had faced a challenge somewhere in their life whether it's through communication or trying to cope with their new life/culture. Communication is very vital in a foreign country, that's where reality hits us, and realize we had to learn the language in order to understand each other, because language depends on it .

I was 12 years old with an understanding of listening to English but had difficulty speaking. As a result I was placed in ESL(English as a second language) program. Nevertheless, I was very smart in all my classes specially in Math and Science. I would study till I understood every word in the book. And if I don't, I would look it up in my English-Amharic dictionary. All my teachers were very staggered how I progressed from a passive to vigorous student. Two of my teachers even skipped me to a higher class.

One time I heard about Magnet School lottery ,college preparatory public high school. I was interested so I went to the Guidance office, I filled out the form unfortunately I had a proficient in English and to apply I have to have advance score in both English and math. I was somewhat disappointed but the only thing I can do is try to improve. I started reading fiction books, write down definitions not only that but since my mom had a language barrier i literally had to go everywhere with her to translate and talk with adults. On the way, i learned so many things that i wouldn't have on my own unless i was old enough to live by myself, such as buying a house, dealing with credit, bills, about the real world in general.

After two years, In my sophomore year, I had a class project where I had to interview my teachers about their jobs. I interviewed my favorite history teacher and on the way we started talking about college and magnet school. I told her my ambition is to get in medical field which is not easy. There is going to be a lot of hard work. She then encouraged me to apply to magnet school and said that I needed to be challenged. She was right. It's one of the best decisions I have made. I got in ----- Magnet school where I'm a junior now. It's very different from other public schools. Everyone cares about their education and has the same goal. I have so much to accomplish through out these journey. These is my unfinished step to college reaching for my American dream.

Undergraduate / Reflect on a challenge you overcame through persistence (two ideas, one to pick) [6]


I totally agree with you.That's what i was thinking when they assigned it but i think it's to help them brainstorm faster.Plus the essay is not the only one, they gave us about 3-4 pages of questions about ourselves and our accomplishments.

OK, I'll make some changes. Thank you so much for the help!