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Posts by Arienne
Joined: Sep 9, 2012
Last Post: Sep 10, 2012
Threads: 1
Posts: 1  
From: malaysia

Displayed posts: 2
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Arienne   
Sep 9, 2012
Writing Feedback / Traffic Congestion - The fundamental problem of modern cities [4]

Topic : Traffic Congestion

Thesis statement
Traffic congestion has been one of the fundamental problems faced by modern cities since the wide usage of automobiles. Just a normal few minutes trip to the convenience store may take up to half an hour due to traffic jam or slowdown. According to the police, congestions are actually the causes of some issues like road rage, road bullies and major accidents. This essay will talk about the causes of traffic congestion and the remedies that may help to improve the situation.

Paragraph 1
First and foremost, there are several factors that contribute to the occurrence of traffic congestion and the rapid increase in the numbers of private automobile ownership due to the development of the country and economy is certainly an undeniable one. Not only it put a dent on the environment with the amount of greenhouse gases it produced, but also precious natural resources like gasoline and diesel are greatly exploited and wasted. The government should further reduce the subsidies on the gasoline and diesel to raise awareness on how important these resources are. Car pooling and taking public transportation should be practiced by the public.

Paragraph 2
In addition, the small road capacity is also one of the contributing factors. As the number of private cars increases greatly over the years, traffic congestion occurs when the needed road capacity is not fulfilled. Simple improvements of the road infrastructure can easily solved this problem. For example, wider roads, overpasses and even underground tunnels could be built to trim down the traffic. Since congestion occurs frequently in the cities, local government municipal can consider passing laws on restricting the number of car owned in a family. This method is in fact, workable and effective.

Paragraph 3
Furthermore, the quality and quantity of the public transport are crucial. Time is equal to money in today's society. Due to the tardiness and lack of maintenance, public transportation is gradually losing its place in the public's hearts. To solve this, the government should invest in improving public transportation to make it more logically convenient, efficient and affordable for all. People will definitely start to choose public transports over their owns once quality meets quantity and making it as their main way of transport. Traffic congestion will surely decrease as a result.

Conclusion
In short, traffic congestion is caused by the public's over-reliance on private transportation and failure to keep up with the zooming expansion of modern societies and their demands. But with great efforts from all, I am positive that traffic congestion can be tackled down.
Arienne   
Sep 10, 2012
Writing Feedback / Traffic Congestion - The fundamental problem of modern cities [4]

Oh, ok. thanks for the help. Really do appreciate it. but i am a little confused. I couldn't really grab your comment. could u please explain it? thanks again.

Your thesis can be better written leading to your body paragraphs.

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