TheJohn
Dec 19, 2012
Grammar, Usage / On the fateful day....... / Question on sentence [3]
Hey everyone, I'm in the process of writing an essay but I couldn't get around to improve this particular sentence. I think it sounds wordy and abstruse, but for the love of God I can't decide what to do with it. Should I split it to two sentences? Should I rephrase it? Thanks!
On the fateful day, I was busily traversing the virtual worlds in Isaac Asimov's I, Robot mini-series at my regular corner at the local library when I was jostled from my mesmerized state unceremoniously by a hoarse voice: "Please, can I have this book after you've finished with it?"
Hey everyone, I'm in the process of writing an essay but I couldn't get around to improve this particular sentence. I think it sounds wordy and abstruse, but for the love of God I can't decide what to do with it. Should I split it to two sentences? Should I rephrase it? Thanks!
On the fateful day, I was busily traversing the virtual worlds in Isaac Asimov's I, Robot mini-series at my regular corner at the local library when I was jostled from my mesmerized state unceremoniously by a hoarse voice: "Please, can I have this book after you've finished with it?"