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Posts by Nicole0223
Joined: Jun 14, 2013
Last Post: Jun 14, 2013
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From: Taiwan

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Nicole0223   
Jun 14, 2013
Writing Feedback / IELTS: Negative effect of modern life's pressures on family life [6]

Besides, heavy stressful...happen.
There are too many "and" showed in one sentence.
I suggest that the sentence should be divided into two sentences.
The first sentence should be ended after dwellers. The second sentence
should start with " Thus, mental and physical deterioration is more likely to happen."
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