Undergraduate / I left Hong Kong in 2007 and became a student at Bowling Green State University in Ohio - common app [11]

Please provide a statement (250 words minimum) that addresses your reasons for transferring and the objectives you hope to achieve.

The following is the new look of my essay.

I left Hong Kong in 2007 and became a student at Bowling Green State University in Ohio. After a semester I found that the environment was not for me. I wanted a vibrant city atmosphere, like Hong Kong, where I could be stimulated by new ideas as I encountered different people and stories each day and involved in a diverse community. I decided to go back to New York City and study at Borough of Manhattan Community College. Since then I began to develop a keen interest in business administration. I started my subscription to the Financial Times newspaper, and read some business- related books, namely "The World Is Flat" and "Goldman Sachs: The Culture of Success". I became more and more interested in business and aspired to a career with a multinational corporation like Goldman Sachs. In preparation for my business studies, I focused on taking a lot of liberal arts courses and some business-related courses at BMCC. However, the classes at BMCC are not very challenging, and in fact, I have longed for a world-class university education. Although I do not want to leave my friends, our club, my relationships with professors and with the college behind, I feel it is time for me to step forward. I love the idea of Cooperative Education at Northeastern University. It would allow me to combine knowledge and skills learnt in the classroom with real-world practices. I could study business management most effectively and gain valuable work experience through NU's co-op programs. Moreover, since I have an interest in globalization and international business, NU would be the best place for me to study at, not only because it is the leading research university in this field, but also because of its resources like the research centers and institutes. With international co-ops and interactions with student from all over the world, NU would best prepare me for a career in global business management. Furthermore, since NU is located in the metropolitan Boston, I would be able to engage in community services and other active organizations both at NU and in the Boston area. Because making connections with different people and with the society is important, NU would provide me with an environment that best fits my needs. At last, NU would be the college of my desirability and I would like to be granted for a chance to be part of your university.

Thank You Very Much.

Undergraduate / 'in love with the stage' - Common App--Elaborate an Activity [13]

elaborate on one of your activities (extracurricular, personal activities, or work experience)(150 words or fewer).

I have fallen in love with the stage since I was 13. Starting out with acting, I got the chances to role play other people who I might never choose to be in my lifetime. Then I tried to create scripts. Screenwriting gave me the opportunities to create stories and design what were going to happen to the characters. Eventually I became a director. Directing was a challenging task in which I had to orchestrate the whole team and oversee the entire production, from proscenium to backstage, of a play. It was the most satisfying moment when I received the highest appreciation from the audience and judges and was awarded "the best director". Sometimes I think life is like a play. Every day is a creation and rehearsal for the future. I would play my roles seriously and direct my life to the fullest and the most it could achieve.

I found it hard to answer this question. I believe it is not good. Please give me some suggestions on how to better my elaboration.

Thank You Very Much.