caramel1
Apr 19, 2015
Speeches / Seeking assistance for rough draft of senior speech [3]
All seniors at my school are required to give a speech in front of the school that can be about anything but should have some sort of message to take away. We don't really need much of an introduction since we have a friend introducing us before we give our speech, but this is my rough draft. I was wondering if I could get feedback on how it sounds, how I can improve it and on a side note: I lived in the children's home I describe in my speech when I was little but I don't mention I did for personal reasons, and I just want to know if it's obvious in any part of the speech that I'm talking about my own experiences or not. Here it is:
The truth is, we're not all blessed with a perfect family. We're all born into different situations we have no control over, and sometimes we don't have a mom or dad to support us. As children, we should all be given love and protection, but some of us aren't that lucky. More often than not, we're told to look up to our parents and follow in their footsteps. Maybe you have an amazing mother who you aspire to be like when you grow up, or a father who would sacrifice everything to watch you succeed. Or maybe, you have no one.
I started volunteering at the HH Home for Children at the beginning of the year. It houses the most severely abused and neglected kids in the state and gives them a safe place to be in and therapeutic treatment to deal with everything they've been through at such a young age. These are children who were born in the most unfortunate situations, and who have had to suffer because of what others have done to them. They don't have parents who they can look up to-the closest thing these kids have to family are the staff workers who are paid to be there 24 hours a day.
All I do is spend one hour a week reading books to young kids to help them fall asleep at night. That doesn't sound like much, but in that one hour I can tell that these kids are special. Now close your eyes for a second and picture a child who is recovering from severe abuse and neglect. Now replace that image with a child who was raised by your idea of a perfect family. You can open your eyes now. Those images probably looked very different to you, but if you took one look at the kids in the home, you wouldn't be able to tell them apart from any other child walking down the street. They may have a different background, and a difficult past to deal with, but in one glance you can see that they have the same bright futures as anyone else.
Let's go back to what I said at the beginning of my speech. Some of us are given a set of parents we can idolize, and some of us are less fortunate. Having your family's support is an amazing feeling, but you don't need anyone's support but your own to be successful. What I've learned from volunteering at the children's home is that it doesn't matter what your background is or who your family is, the ability to be successful is in each and everyone of us.
***
Thank you so much!
All seniors at my school are required to give a speech in front of the school that can be about anything but should have some sort of message to take away. We don't really need much of an introduction since we have a friend introducing us before we give our speech, but this is my rough draft. I was wondering if I could get feedback on how it sounds, how I can improve it and on a side note: I lived in the children's home I describe in my speech when I was little but I don't mention I did for personal reasons, and I just want to know if it's obvious in any part of the speech that I'm talking about my own experiences or not. Here it is:
The truth is, we're not all blessed with a perfect family. We're all born into different situations we have no control over, and sometimes we don't have a mom or dad to support us. As children, we should all be given love and protection, but some of us aren't that lucky. More often than not, we're told to look up to our parents and follow in their footsteps. Maybe you have an amazing mother who you aspire to be like when you grow up, or a father who would sacrifice everything to watch you succeed. Or maybe, you have no one.
I started volunteering at the HH Home for Children at the beginning of the year. It houses the most severely abused and neglected kids in the state and gives them a safe place to be in and therapeutic treatment to deal with everything they've been through at such a young age. These are children who were born in the most unfortunate situations, and who have had to suffer because of what others have done to them. They don't have parents who they can look up to-the closest thing these kids have to family are the staff workers who are paid to be there 24 hours a day.
All I do is spend one hour a week reading books to young kids to help them fall asleep at night. That doesn't sound like much, but in that one hour I can tell that these kids are special. Now close your eyes for a second and picture a child who is recovering from severe abuse and neglect. Now replace that image with a child who was raised by your idea of a perfect family. You can open your eyes now. Those images probably looked very different to you, but if you took one look at the kids in the home, you wouldn't be able to tell them apart from any other child walking down the street. They may have a different background, and a difficult past to deal with, but in one glance you can see that they have the same bright futures as anyone else.
Let's go back to what I said at the beginning of my speech. Some of us are given a set of parents we can idolize, and some of us are less fortunate. Having your family's support is an amazing feeling, but you don't need anyone's support but your own to be successful. What I've learned from volunteering at the children's home is that it doesn't matter what your background is or who your family is, the ability to be successful is in each and everyone of us.
***
Thank you so much!