wauiwa
Jul 6, 2016
Writing Feedback / IELTS Essay about the freedom of creative artists - [5]
Topic from Cambridge IELTS test Book 4 - part 3
Creative artists should always be given freedom to express their own ideas (in words, picture, music, film) in whichever way they wish. There should be no government restrictions on what they do.
To what extend do you agree or disagree with this statement?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
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People often have differing views on whether there should be a line drew to limit artistic freedom for the benefits of the society. In my opinion, I fully support to set a certain rule to keep artists' expression within the limits.
Each society and nation has different set of practices to follow and artistic freedom should be demonstrated within that containments. For example, an artist should respect local culture and avoid incurring any controversial implications or attempting to fuel any sensitive topics such as religions or personal believe. Having the nationwide constraints in place will also help to ensure fairness and equality, with no artist getting a competitive advantage over one another. Moreover, the restrictions enforcement can benefit the artists to minimize the chance of being lure to be the victim or a proxy of viral marketing.
Artistic freedom with zero control can pose several threats to the healthiness of the society. Firstly, successful artists and famous figures have great influence on the population at large. In fact, they are supposed to be the role model to children, so any bad example will affect our future generations. Secondly, everybody must abide the laws, regardless of their popularity. Therefore, nobody should be given the special right to cause any disturbance to the public. Finally, it will be hard to distinguish whether the opinion or idea is purely from an artistic perspective. Undoubtedly, there is a chance of a hidden agenda being cloaked as a simply innocent point of view. Artists will be prone and at risk of being used more to gain political advantages or attack certain individual for monetary gains, for instance.
In conclusion, I disagree to eliminate the ground rules for artists' freedom of speech toward the public. Since there are several drawbacks as stated above.
I scored Band 6 in my first attempt last year and my target in the exam next week is for at least Band 7. Could anyone assess my work and provide your feedback on the evaluation (if possible, based on IELTS criteria), your opinion about the Band I should get out of this, and way to improve. Thank you so much in advance.
Topic from Cambridge IELTS test Book 4 - part 3
Creative artists should always be given freedom to express their own ideas (in words, picture, music, film) in whichever way they wish. There should be no government restrictions on what they do.
To what extend do you agree or disagree with this statement?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
People often have differing views on whether there should be a line drew to limit artistic freedom for the benefits of the society. In my opinion, I fully support to set a certain rule to keep artists' expression within the limits.
Each society and nation has different set of practices to follow and artistic freedom should be demonstrated within that containments. For example, an artist should respect local culture and avoid incurring any controversial implications or attempting to fuel any sensitive topics such as religions or personal believe. Having the nationwide constraints in place will also help to ensure fairness and equality, with no artist getting a competitive advantage over one another. Moreover, the restrictions enforcement can benefit the artists to minimize the chance of being lure to be the victim or a proxy of viral marketing.
Artistic freedom with zero control can pose several threats to the healthiness of the society. Firstly, successful artists and famous figures have great influence on the population at large. In fact, they are supposed to be the role model to children, so any bad example will affect our future generations. Secondly, everybody must abide the laws, regardless of their popularity. Therefore, nobody should be given the special right to cause any disturbance to the public. Finally, it will be hard to distinguish whether the opinion or idea is purely from an artistic perspective. Undoubtedly, there is a chance of a hidden agenda being cloaked as a simply innocent point of view. Artists will be prone and at risk of being used more to gain political advantages or attack certain individual for monetary gains, for instance.
In conclusion, I disagree to eliminate the ground rules for artists' freedom of speech toward the public. Since there are several drawbacks as stated above.
I scored Band 6 in my first attempt last year and my target in the exam next week is for at least Band 7. Could anyone assess my work and provide your feedback on the evaluation (if possible, based on IELTS criteria), your opinion about the Band I should get out of this, and way to improve. Thank you so much in advance.