LauraMoriarty
Oct 19, 2017
Writing Feedback / A school has been given money to spend on one thing to improve the school. [2]
Hi! I started learning English two years ago and my skills are not good at all. However, I have to pass TOEFL in a month for education abroad.
I will write essays every day and, please, help me to improve this skill. I would like to get detailed fixes. Thank you!
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A school has been given money to spend on one thing to improve the school. Do you think it is better to spend the money on organizing social activities for students to participate in after school hours, or on improving the quality of the food served in the cafeteria?
Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
_______________________________________________
In today's world, a school always tries to provide all needs of their students, but it is often difficult to decide which areas they should spend money on. Some people believe that it is important to fund the organization of social activities after school hours, while others feel that it is preferable to prioritize food served issues. From my perspective, quality of food in cafeteria plays a significant role than social activities. I feel this way for two reasons which I will explore in the following essay.
To begin with, nutritional problems are a more urgent concern than issues surrounding the public activities. The last ones can be organized by teachers as extra classes for free or even discussed during the lessons. Therefore, the cafeterias need finance to provide low-fat and vegetarian lunch options to accommodate the governmental nutrition guidelines. Poor conditions at canteens and less-balanced food can cause several numbers of diseases, such as obesity and diabetes. The changes of the food's taste have made many students be obsessed with fast food and school cafeterias keep selling it instead of making a healthy meal. For example, lots of surveys among the students around the world show that they are not satisfied by food made in school cafeterias because of the lack of healthy or fresh ingredients and sanitary conditions. Besides, two things that were mentioned most were the quality and taste. This means that schools generally need to fund their cafeterias to improve the sort of the meal, which is a vital source of energy.
What is more, the nutrition at school is very expensive, despite many drawbacks and the quality, which does not match the price. Doubtless, it is unfair to pay for a cold pizza, undercooked patties or hamburgers, and brown lettuce, which sounds even nasty. For instance, in my school's cafeteria always has been sold poorly made food for a great price. Parents of students had to write a petition against. As a result, the principal has taken action, and he has set down rules that prohibit these foods in the school.
In conclusion, I feel that if the school is forced to make a choice, it should choose to improve cafeterias rather than the social activities. The arguments I have presented suggest that food served issues are a more pressing concern and the school is obligated to feed pupils with healthy food.
Hi! I started learning English two years ago and my skills are not good at all. However, I have to pass TOEFL in a month for education abroad.
I will write essays every day and, please, help me to improve this skill. I would like to get detailed fixes. Thank you!
_______________________________________________
A school has been given money to spend on one thing to improve the school. Do you think it is better to spend the money on organizing social activities for students to participate in after school hours, or on improving the quality of the food served in the cafeteria?
Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
_______________________________________________
food served issues at schools
In today's world, a school always tries to provide all needs of their students, but it is often difficult to decide which areas they should spend money on. Some people believe that it is important to fund the organization of social activities after school hours, while others feel that it is preferable to prioritize food served issues. From my perspective, quality of food in cafeteria plays a significant role than social activities. I feel this way for two reasons which I will explore in the following essay.
To begin with, nutritional problems are a more urgent concern than issues surrounding the public activities. The last ones can be organized by teachers as extra classes for free or even discussed during the lessons. Therefore, the cafeterias need finance to provide low-fat and vegetarian lunch options to accommodate the governmental nutrition guidelines. Poor conditions at canteens and less-balanced food can cause several numbers of diseases, such as obesity and diabetes. The changes of the food's taste have made many students be obsessed with fast food and school cafeterias keep selling it instead of making a healthy meal. For example, lots of surveys among the students around the world show that they are not satisfied by food made in school cafeterias because of the lack of healthy or fresh ingredients and sanitary conditions. Besides, two things that were mentioned most were the quality and taste. This means that schools generally need to fund their cafeterias to improve the sort of the meal, which is a vital source of energy.
What is more, the nutrition at school is very expensive, despite many drawbacks and the quality, which does not match the price. Doubtless, it is unfair to pay for a cold pizza, undercooked patties or hamburgers, and brown lettuce, which sounds even nasty. For instance, in my school's cafeteria always has been sold poorly made food for a great price. Parents of students had to write a petition against. As a result, the principal has taken action, and he has set down rules that prohibit these foods in the school.
In conclusion, I feel that if the school is forced to make a choice, it should choose to improve cafeterias rather than the social activities. The arguments I have presented suggest that food served issues are a more pressing concern and the school is obligated to feed pupils with healthy food.