Undergraduate / "The limit does not exist!" - Personal essay - Canadian destination [3]

I've chosen Canada

"The limit does not exist!" , shouts Cady Heron at the Illinois High School Mathletes State Championship as she finally solves the math equation, after she realized that all you can do in life is to solve the problem right in front of you (Cady, Mean Girls, 1:25:40). Somehow, in a way, that line has stuck with me throughout the hardships and the challenges I've dealt with in life.

Mean Girls is undeniably one of my favorite films to watch, thanks to the clever writings of Tina Fey and the brilliant acting of Lindsay Lohan and Rachel McAdams (Mean Girls, 2004). Unfortunately, life isn't always an exceptional teen movie. Going to secondary school at first, was a difficult time for a skinny 12-year-old boy, who was obsessed with citing lines from cult films such as Heathers or Death Becomes Her and secretly jamming out to Joy Division on the bus ride back home. The idea of fitting in in school was terrifying, I was so self-conscious of what others would think of me, they would not understand my humor or judge me because of the way I talk or look. That mindset has kept me in a shell for a long time, not opening up to people and always hearing comments asking me why am I so shy, when as a matter of fact, I'm actually "cooler" than most of these kids. Slowly, I came to realize the only reason keeping me from showing the truly sensational human being that I am, was myself ,and being "cool" was only a construct, which I had teared apart. Expressing myself was more freeing that I ever thought it would be, people accepted me for who I am, without the need to change into something that I'm not, to fit in a mold. Of course, being my true self, I'd still quote scenes from those iconic films on a daily basis, even when I knew none of my friends would get the references.

Three years of secondary school went past me like a wind, I could not believe it for a moment. But it was when I sat down with my parents in our living room, that I had to face reality - a sudden decision from my parents. "We've decided that you're going abroad to Germany next year", said mom. It's hard to describe how I was feeling then, as I could barely grasp to the words that were coming out of my parents' mouths and "in shock" is definitely an understatement. Soon enough, I began to study German for almost every day in summer. However; what I've found to be harder than learning the language, was the fact that I needed to say goodbye to my closest friends in a matter of time. I believe, why we hold on to things so tight, as we do, is because we fear something so great won't happen again ,and the friends I've had the pleasure to have and to grow up with in Vietnam, are some of the most extraordinary people I know. While looking back, I still remember vividly one girl told me how much I've helped her, when she first join our school, to be a part of the class by including her in the "inside jokes", trying to get her to open up more,...For that, I was extremely proud of myself, because I, once, was that new kid, and I've somehow left such a big impact on someone. Leaving this perfect picture of family and friends behind, I knew I had to start over, but much like Cady Heron, I was scared, yet again, of a new beginning.

Entering high school in Germany was as big of a cultural shock as I thought it would be. Way before getting accustomed to the fascinating traditions or the cuisine of this country, I was more concerned with seeing fresh faces at school, whom speak a completely different language. One obstacle after another, I started to learn every subject in school in German. Not being able to understand the new words and having to look them up in the dictionary was a struggle, nevertheless, I love myself a challenge. Every day after school, I'd do my grammar exercises and practice solving the problems I didn't know how to do. Finally, I've succeed by excelling in every test and rose up being one of the top students in my class as I always strive to do better. It was, indeed, a bumpy road, but I didn't let the small rocks on the way stop me from getting to the finish line.

Living in a different country has definitely taught me that I shouldn't underestimate my abilities. I've not only proven to my family, my teachers, but most importantly myself, that I am independent and I can do anything, as long as I put in the work. Although I would never say that I'm fearless, I have the courage to face my fears, and that's a lot coming from a person who only weighs 122 pounds. Therefore, I'm always eager to expand my horizon and I've chosen Canada to be my next destination. Because I know, for a fact, my limit does not exist.