Leisa
Nov 9, 2019
Writing Feedback / IELTS WRITING TASK 2: YOUNG PEOPLE ARE IMPOLITE AND DISRESPECTFUL TO THE OLD. CAUSES AND SOLUTIONS? [2]
TOPIC: In some countries, young people are less polite and respectful to the old. What are the causes? What can be done to solve this?
In recent years, as many countries have developed, the living standards is being better while the youngsters" behaviors towards the old folks are discourteous and disrespectful. The cause of this issue might be from families and medias. Therefore, there are numerous solutions to resolve this problem.
Comparing to the old days, when the technology has not been improved, children tend to spend more time with their parents so that they can learn how to have suitable attitudes for different type of people, especially the elders. However, parents live in modern days are much more concentrate on their careers, which create a distance between the family members. Consequently, youngsters do not have the chances to be educated in good manners. Moreover, since they not receive much affection from their parents, they start addicting to medias, a way to get away from the boring and lonely, which lead to the fact that they are being affected negatively by the virtual world and intimate the bad behaviors of the characters or strangers on TV shows, movies, internet and games.
There are, however, ways to taken down the problems. First of all, the youths must be educated since they are still study in school if their parents not have enough spare time for their children. For instance, instead of just absorbing knowledge of compulsory subjects, ethics must be added to the school's curriculum as an essential subject. Secondly, not only shows and movies, but games and contents on social media need to be censored carefully in order to have an appropriate rate for each group of ages. In this way, young people are not exposed much violent and approach the right ways of how to treat the elderly.
In conclusion, despite how busy the job is, parents should not too focus on their careers that they forget to take care of their children because family is the one who close to the youths the most.
P/S: Please give me the correction for my writing. Is there anything I need to improve? Thankss
concern about attitude of youngsters today
TOPIC: In some countries, young people are less polite and respectful to the old. What are the causes? What can be done to solve this?
In recent years, as many countries have developed, the living standards is being better while the youngsters" behaviors towards the old folks are discourteous and disrespectful. The cause of this issue might be from families and medias. Therefore, there are numerous solutions to resolve this problem.
Comparing to the old days, when the technology has not been improved, children tend to spend more time with their parents so that they can learn how to have suitable attitudes for different type of people, especially the elders. However, parents live in modern days are much more concentrate on their careers, which create a distance between the family members. Consequently, youngsters do not have the chances to be educated in good manners. Moreover, since they not receive much affection from their parents, they start addicting to medias, a way to get away from the boring and lonely, which lead to the fact that they are being affected negatively by the virtual world and intimate the bad behaviors of the characters or strangers on TV shows, movies, internet and games.
There are, however, ways to taken down the problems. First of all, the youths must be educated since they are still study in school if their parents not have enough spare time for their children. For instance, instead of just absorbing knowledge of compulsory subjects, ethics must be added to the school's curriculum as an essential subject. Secondly, not only shows and movies, but games and contents on social media need to be censored carefully in order to have an appropriate rate for each group of ages. In this way, young people are not exposed much violent and approach the right ways of how to treat the elderly.
In conclusion, despite how busy the job is, parents should not too focus on their careers that they forget to take care of their children because family is the one who close to the youths the most.
P/S: Please give me the correction for my writing. Is there anything I need to improve? Thankss
