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Posts by mmatmmee
Name: Sasatorn
Joined: Sep 5, 2024
Last Post: Sep 24, 2024
Threads: 3
Posts: 3  
From: Thailand
School: -

Displayed posts: 6
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mmatmmee   
Sep 24, 2024
Writing Feedback / IELTS Task 2: Advantage/Disadvantage on longer life expectancy [2]

One of the consequences of improved medical care is that people are living longer, and life expectancy is increasing. Do you think the advantage of this development outweighs the disadvantages?

The advancement of medicine has had significant impacts on many aspects of society. One of the most obvious effects is the increased life expectancy of the population. While some people consider this development a benefit, I personally believe that the drawbacks outweigh the advantages.

As people live longer, countries will inevitably face the challenge of an aging society. In other words, an aging population brings about rising costs to society. As citizens grow older and weaker, the tax burden on society increases. If a large portion of the population is elderly and retired, pension costs and taxes will rise, creating a heavier burden for younger, tax-paying individuals. Additionally, older members of society require more specialized care as their health deteriorates, leading to higher medical costs due to increased demand. For example, nursing services for the elderly in Thailand are currently inadequate due to the growing number of aging citizens.

On the other hand, the increasing number of older people can offer some benefits to society. Firstly, longer life expectancy allows older individuals to pass on knowledge and help train younger generations in their respective fields. For instance, many traditional crafts require wisdom passed down through generations. If people live longer, these original techniques can be preserved and shared with younger generations. Furthermore, advancements in the healthcare industry could also be a positive consequence of an aging population, benefiting future generations as they age.

In conclusion, while there are a few advantages to longer life expectancy, the disadvantages, such as higher tax burdens and increased healthcare costs, outweigh the positive aspects. It is crucial for governments to address these potential drawbacks before they become major societal issues.
mmatmmee   
Sep 22, 2024
Writing Feedback / IELTS Task 2: Work for the same organisation all their working life VS different organisation [2]

In recent years, younger generations have experienced a change of mindset. Most adults prefer working for a similar company, whereas the young populations decide to change the workplace constantly. While there are some controversial aspects associated with this topic, I believe that working for diverse companies is a better option than staying in the same organisation.

To begin with, employees tend to gain new experiences in various fields due to frequent changes in workplace. Employees can use these knowledge to improve their skills in the future. In other words, employees who do not remain in the same organisation are usually flexible and can deal with almost every work without any challenges. Another reason why individuals who are still young tend to work for different companies is a network with diverse people. Workplace is not only a place to work, but also an environment where one can acquire connection with people and build professional relationships, which would be useful in the future.

On the other hand, working for various organisations is not suitable for everyone. Some adults prefer staying at the same company for some reasons, such as job stability and steady income. For instance, my mother worked for the same bank for ten years, and due to her accomplishments, she was promoted to higher positions, resulting in a significant salary increase. Moreover, while communication with different people is an essential skill, not everyone finds it easy to adapt to new environments. For example, introverts may find it challenging to integrate into new workplaces, which could affect their performance.

In summary, although some workers think it is better to work for one company for a lifetime, I believe it is too tedious, as you meet the same colleagues every day for decades. Personally, I think frequently changing the workplace gives a lot of opportunities for employees to receive diverse skills and build professional connection with new societies.
mmatmmee   
Sep 5, 2024
Writing Feedback / IELTS WRITING TASK 2- TOPIC: Advertisment [3]

I think there's some word choice to concern, "less suggestive" to "less influenced". A concluding paragraph is also too short.
mmatmmee   
Sep 5, 2024
Writing Feedback / IELTS Task 2: An increasing number or professional leaving their own poorer countries [2]

Prompt: An increasing number of professional, such as teachers and doctors are leaving their own poorer countries to work in developed countries. What are the reasons for this trend? What effect does it have on the countries professionals are leaving?

In recent years, the rate of new generation emigrate to work in richer countries has increased. There is a certain factor that causes this circumstance and it results in dramatic detriment for the departed countries.

The major reasons the professionals have a tendency to seek employment in more developed countries are a higher standard of living and opportunities for professionals growth. For instance, the average monthly salary for a white-collar worker, such as teacher, in so-called first world nations is surpassing a developing country. In addition, employees in developed countries can balance their working life and personal time effectively because of a well-organised workflow system and a well-prepared facility. An outdated amenity and equipment in poor states hinders the ability of professionals, such as doctor, to practice and improve their skills.

The increasing amounts of employees who seek their job in first world nations definitely has an invariably negative consequences towards the developing nations. In Thailand, emigrating to better job opportunities in another countries was a trend around 2019-2021. Subsequently, the brain drain situation spreads throughout years, not only in Thailand but also most of third world countries encounter this issue. The nations lose the talents from new generation and opportunities to continue developing.
In conclusion, a higher living quality coupled with the opportunity to advance one's career are the main reason why professionals migrate to richer countries. The countries they leave behind struggle to find suitably qualified replacements and thus suffer from social and economic stagnations.
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