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Posts by franksredhoteats
Name: Max Yuan
Joined: Oct 27, 2024
Last Post: Dec 25, 2024
Threads: 1
Posts: 1  
From: United States
School: Saint John's High School

Displayed posts: 2
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franksredhoteats   
Dec 25, 2024
Undergraduate / Tufts Engineering - community essay [2]

Using a specific example or two, tell us about a way that you contributed to building a collaborative and/or inclusive community

Having always been passionate about creative projects and STEM engineering, I joined my high school's robotics team my sophomore year. Since the team was still in its infancy, I focused on designing different mechanisms for the robot that I could use to help my group succeed, as there was no strategy in place for success. I spent countless hours sitting behind my Chromebook, reading articles about which differential gears could work as joints, or how much torque each motor would generate to power our robot forward. Then I began to experiment with the imaginative CAD software Fusion360 with our robot's drivetrain. These early stepping stones helped open my eyes to different strategies to help my team create future robots for the FIRST Tech Challenge competition.
During my second year on the team, I immersed myself in Fusion360. I designed prototypes for smooth integration between subgroups of builders, programmers, and designers like myself. Whenever a design refused to cycle consistently - an intake claw, for instance - I quickly set out to think of a new solution with my fellow team members.
During my senior year, our robotics team has become a well-oiled machine, fueled by the momentum of our team to excel in FTC robot competitions and beyond. We have earned multiple CAD design awards at the state level, as well as a State Championship award jointly with the team. Aside from awards, the team has always had my back in numerous situations, and has truly become a second family to me. When I think about my robotics team, the proverb "Concordia res parvae" (In harmony, small things grow) often comes to mind. The mutual support and camaraderie of my FTC teammates have helped me grow as a young man and taught me a great deal about teamwork and collaboration.

Right now I am trying to rewrite these for ED2 round and I'm trying to focus more on what I did for the team rather than achieved in awards. How do I make the information in this passage tuned more specifically towards teamwork and collaboration?
franksredhoteats   
Nov 2, 2024
Undergraduate / The Ideological and Emotional Interconnectedness of Humanity: Common App Main Personal Statement [4]

@gigi_aa Sorry if im too late! After reading this through, I really believe that this an Ivy-league tier essay. It really shows your ethic roots and background, and invokes a lot of powerful imagery throughout that could captivate admission readers. the only thing i would change would be the organization, into a fewer paragraphs just for readibility purposes.

anyways, this was truly a great essay! praying you get into your dream college :)
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