Undergraduate / "Father from South American country, I moved to Orlando" - UCF Application Essay [5]

Hey everyone, my first post here. Below is my essay that is part of the UCF application. I will put the question before the actual response. Read it over, I'm open to criticism.

Thanks.

2. How has your family history, culture or environment influenced who you are?

"The happiest moments of my life have been the few which I have passed at home in the bosom of my family." This quote from Thomas Jefferson reveals just how invaluable a real family is. My father came to America from a small South American country with 32 dollars and a suitcase with some clothes. Since his arrival, he managed to start a family and made life comfortable for us. He accomplished this without a formal education. He had learned growing up that there was a price to success, hard work. Because of him and my mother's sacrifice and labor, many opportunities became available. I learned from them that I must endeavor to achieve my goals.

I am extremely close with my family, and they have a great impact on me. As a child, family vacations were regular, such as camping, road trips, and sightseeing. I was taught little facts during the trip, some of them I still recall today. Every holiday we meet with the entire family, and spend time together, especially around Thanksgiving and Christmas. Whenever the whole family unites, there is a certain warmth, and connection between everyone. I can trust the advice from my older cousins, and I trust myself to offer my opinions to my younger ones. My aunts and uncles have all given me guidance and have helped set me on the educational path I am now on. I love them all, as much as I love those in my immediate family.

3. Why did you choose to apply to UCF?

When I moved to Orlando at the age of twelve, I was not thinking about college, or even high school. But as my senior year draws to a close, I am pressed with the question about which university to attend, and my thoughts drift towards UCF. I was part of a Dual Enrollment program that worked with my high school and a local community college. But compared to the atmosphere of high school, the community college seemed stale and dull. When I took the UCF tour my eyes were opened to how lively a university could be. The entire campus was filled with people, each heading towards their destination, while some lingered and talked with others. It felt lively, and it gave me the same feeling as high school. The campus is very clean, and the location is very central to the city of Orlando. Its curriculum and courses offers many options. I plan on working in the medical field, and now that UCF has the College of Medicine opened up, it made me even more certain that UCF is the college I want to attend.

Tell me what you think!
Thanks again!