Undergraduate / "Through Heaven and Hell" Common App Essay #1 [4]

Hello this is my essay for the common application. I am new to essayforum... Please comment and be harsh with the editing.... thank you in advance

Through Hell and Heaven
Thump- thump, Thump-thump. I hear a pounding in the back of my head. I try to listen and pinpoint the rhythmic sound. After a few moments I realize that it is my heartbeat. Waiting for my turn to perform in front of a panel of judges at the MTNA Senior Music Piano Competition is not an easy thing to do. Hurriedly I look over my music for some last minute reassurance. As I send up my final prayers and wipe the sweat off my hands, my mind flashes back to the beginning of my music career.

I remember asking my mom if I could learn to play the piano at the young age of five. Honestly I can't remember why I chose the piano over all the other instruments I could have played. Whatever the reason, I stuck with the piano for twelve years, watching myself improve. Through all the years of practicing, frustration, time, and commitment there was one thing that my mom told me almost everyday: "Always do the best that you can, but more than that, enjoy yourself."

I am pulled back to the present as a woman's voice calls my name, announcing me to the judges. As I walk into the room and see the anticipating eyes, I panic. Suddenly, I do not remember what I'm supposed to do. When I sit down on the bench I close my eyes and try to calm myself. My mom's words come back to me. Enjoy yourself. Do your best. Opening my eyes I rest my hands on the keys. With a deep breath I start Franz Liszt's Dante Sonata.

One of the reasons I chose the Dante Sonata was the story that it told. Just like Dante's epic poem The Divine Comedy, it tells the story of traveling down into the depths of hell, through purgatory, and finally traveling up to heaven. Now as I play the sonata, I am flying down into the depths of hell as I make the journey with the lost souls. The pounding and wailing of the souls resonate in my ear as I play the dark notes of the piece. All is quiet. The notes come to a pause as the piece transitions into the final section. Then slowly and softly I hear the music of heaven and the angels singing. For these few minutes I am not playing the music, I am living it, feeling it, hearing it, and experiencing it. All too soon my fingers ring out the last notes and I am brought back to the little room with the MTNA judges.

A smile stretches across the expanse of my face as I realize exactly how exhilarated I feel. Giving my best had been far too easy once I started enjoying myself. The performance taught me to have the right kind of attitude. I was not thinking about messing up, being nervous, losing the competition, or disappointing my teacher and parents. Instead of being caught up in my fears and "what-ifs", I chose to let myself go and enjoy the piece. The fact that I can shape my own experiences and that I can control the best that I can be gives me the confidence to tackle any future circumstance no matter what it is.

After my performance an elderly lady who had been in the audience came up to me to give me words of praise. "Your playing was beautiful. I enjoyed it so much!" I looked at her and smiled saying, "So did I."