Unanswered [1] | Urgent [0]
  

Posts by lauren88
Joined: Jan 10, 2011
Last Post: Jan 11, 2011
Threads: 1
Posts: 3  
From: United States of America

Displayed posts: 4
sort: Latest first   Oldest first  | 
lauren88   
Jan 10, 2011
Undergraduate / Study Abroad Essay- Barcelona (your first choice program) [5]

Your essay read a bit like a travel journal rather than a statement of purpose.

The sound of grandmothers bargaining for the morning's catch will help me improve on my language skills as I'll try to decipher their rapid chatter. The flavors of paella will expand my picky palette. The smell of incense will draw me into the Catedral de Barcelona where I can explore its valley of tombs and delve into a religion that is not my own. The sight of pure grandeur in the form the Barcelona skyline-a medley of acroterions, myriad domes, mosaics, and finials-will leave me in utter awe.

These examples sound pretty, but get boring after the first two... I think you can cut down a lot here and simply mention "cuisine, art, architecture"

On a corner half way between La Sagrada Famlia and La Pedrera, I will find a 20th century masterpiece that isn't designed by the idolized Antoní Gaudí.

This sentence is unnecessary.

My gaze will instead pay tribute to the unsung hero of modernisme architecture: Domènech i Montaner. At the turn of the century, he seized the opportunity to usher in a new form of modern design, rampant as it was with neo-Gothic motifs that linked the Barcelona's industrialization to its rich medieval history. His creations captured the blend of civic pride and social rise of the time; the buildings still radiate these sentiments that I wish so much to feel as I learn about the people who lived in it hundreds of years ago.

This is good. I think you can focus on just one thing about Barcelona that you like and KNOW a lot about to show that you have done your research.

I'm not sure you answered the question "How does it fit into the scheme of your education?"
I didn't get why learning a language is important to you. Did you study Catalan or Spanish before? Are you a literature, architect, or international business major? How will the experience help your future? (more specifically than just "broaden your horizon")

and the phrase "Catalan pronunciation" is confusing. Catalan is an entirely different language than Spanish (though related). So other than pronunciation, you also need to learn grammar and orthography...

Overall, your tone sounds too dramatically rather than professional to me. A dramatic tone in the first paragraph might be OK. But this is a bit much.

BTW, on a personal note, I taught English in Barcelona for a year. It wasn't all that much fun =/ Hope you get in and have a better experience!
lauren88   
Jan 10, 2011
Graduate / applying to MA in Comm. Sci. and Disorders with BA in Linguistics + teaching exp. [8]

Thanks in advance for taking the time to read this! I will be eternally grateful!

I'm applying to a M.A. program in CSD.

My early college years were spent assessing which career best suited my strengths, interests, and personal goals. There were four classes that were to have a lasting impact on my career choice. They are Introduction to Linguistics, Anatomy and Physiology of the Speech, Hearing, and Language Mechanisms, Speech Science, and Survey of Adult Neurogenic Disorders. All of these classes widened my understanding of the field of speech-language pathology, further stimulated my interest, and strengthened my resolve to become a speech-language pathologist (SLP). However, the experience that was to permanently change my academic trajectory from English to Communication Sciences and Disorders ocurred prior to my attendence of these courses.

After my first full semester at the University XXX, I got in a car accident. From the accident, I sustained a broken left tibia, substantial damage to both ankles leaving me unable to walk, and I suffered a mild traumatic brain injury (MTBI) which would manifest itself approximately six months after the incident. Though, a lot of damage had been inflicted in a split second, the negative effects (both physical and cognitive) were not to leave the deepest impact on me.

To this day, I still have a profound feeling of appreciation for all of the healthcare professionals that came to my aid that morning. From the Emergency Medical Technicians who stabilized me and shuttled me to the XXX Emergency Department to the doctor who surgically placed two screws in my left ankle so that it would heal appropriately. These are the people who have changed me. These are the people who have motivated me to take my love of language and channel it into the healing of others. It was their compassion that can now be identified, without doubt, as the impetus of my career goals.

The academic semesters of fall of 2003 and spring of 2004, I made very little tangible academic progress, but my diligence and devotion to not throwing in the towel paid dividends in my overall cognitive recovery. The constant challenge of performing in my classes kept me mentally engaged. Though, I struggled with bouts of anxiety, panic attacks, and general confusion the end result was worth the while. I had completed my first full semester since the car accident and, more importantly, the success gave me the confidence that I was going to make a full recovery.

I was working part-time at XXX as a teaching assistant and going to school full-time. This was to be the first semester that I was to find myself on the Dean's honor list. My experiences as a security officer at XXX hospital have also been instrumental in strengthening my resolve in becoming a SLP. I take great pride in giving my coworkers, our patients, and visitors accurate and useful information. Having worked with and successfully managed nervous expectant fathers, families in mourning over the loss of a loved one and the occasional inappropriate visitor and/or patient has given me a great deal of confidence when confronted with the tough situations that sometimes crop up during daily hospital operations.

I am particularly interested in working with patients with aphasia. The impact of living in a world that does not understand your impairment can be frustrating and a daunting task. Consider how an individual would feel if their family, friends, or doctors did not understand or were not even empathetic to daily struggles brought on by an acquired language disorder such as Aphasia. I seek to shed new light on aphasia by creating an instant message client which emulates the effects of aphasia. Aphasia usually results from lesions to the language-relevant areas of the frontal, temporal and parietal lobes of the brain, such as Broca's area, Wernicke's area, and the neural pathways between them. These areas are almost always located in the left hemisphere, and in most people this is where the ability to produce and comprehend language is found.

However, in a very small number of people, language ability is found in the right hemisphere. In either case, damage to these language areas can be caused by a stroke, traumatic brain injury, or other brain injury. Aphasia may also develop slowly, as in the case of a brain tumor or progressive neurological disease, e.g., Alzheimer's or Parkinson's disease. It may also be caused by a sudden hemorrhagic event within the brain. Certain chronic neurological disorders, such as epilepsy or migraine, can also include transient aphasia as a prodromal or episodic symptom.

I have decided to pursue graduate school at Univesity XXX since a.) I know the faculty and staff in the Communication Sciences and Disorders Department are top notch, b.) there is a medical tract for those who lean more towards this facet of speech-language pathology, and c.) I am overjoyed by the possibility that I might receive an externship at the VA hospital, a position I feel my unique background and interests are particularly suited for. Both Professor XXX and Dr. XXX have mentioned this opportunity to me, knowing my interests. I would love nothing more than to help them to attain the wholeness that I now feel largely due to the hard work and compassion of healthcare professionals.
Need Writing or Editing Help?
Fill out one of these forms:

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Best Essay Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳

Academic AI Writer:
Custom AI Writer ◳